Quote From: cherokeerose Hello, Luv!
Many women(men) think they can change the 'intended' once they are married. But, by the time a man or woman is marriageable, behavior patterns are set............or there'd be no business for the shrinks. What's more, people ALWAYS tell you who they are, and you should listen, listen, listen. The hormone thingie passes, and what's left is business. What that business entails, should be worked out before the dotted line is signed. Too late for that now.
If you love this man, then make all efforts to gain counseling together. If he refuses, that's a clue. We have one life, we should seek it to be fulfilled.
I don't know if your problem is real or imagined by Nathan, but HE MOST CERTAINLY has a problem with control. You're not his puppet on his string, you're an equal partner, with equal responsibilities and equal opportunities when it comes to decisions. He needs someone to help him grow up, but that won't be you. Get some help for yourself if he refuses to go to counseling with you, and make him an offer he can't refuse or, hopefully, won't.
Some time ago someone figured out how much the '
master of house' would pay in wages if he had to reimburse for everything the '
drudge/wife' does for him in the home. Nathan would not be a happy camper if you were to start charging him.
So, luv, take charge of YOUR life, look at all the angles and make your move. Life goes by so fast.
I have a problem with gaining some control in my marriage. I have been married for 7 years we lived together for 7 years. so in the total of 14 years being with the same man I am finding not only do I not have a voice I don't have a outside job either. We have our own construction business and when business is down then so am I because it is then I start hearing about how I should get a job and make some money. Our marriage is just going downhill fast. I can't seem to get him to understand that marriage counseling might help. He feels that I don't do anything because I don't bring in a paycheck. I don't have anyplace to go , I have been looking for work but not getting anything. I have worked in the past but have not been working since we got married. I feel like I don't know what to do or where to go. We talk about divorce all the time and he says I can leave because he owns the house and I am not working anyway.
