Replies to 'Pornography'

I console myself with the knowledge that, for me anyway, it feels better, more invigorating on the grand scale, to want than to be wanted. Just as it feels better to give love than to receive it, although a combination of the two is definitely preferable. I never doubt his love for me, of course; I only doubt his desire. I've come to terms with this, however, because of two things. 1. He has proven several times that his lack of desire for sex, as he says, truly has nothing to do with me. He simply has a much lower sex drive than me and this stems mostly from the fact that he's a workaholic and is always more focused on career than relationships. When he gets some time off, however, or when we go on vacation for a few days, his sex drive increases and nearly matches mine. So I know that it really is work that distracts him from his need for sex. 2. I've had relationships in the past that were more about sex, and they didn't make me happy. I dated one man, for example, for three years before I met my husband and we had oodles of sexual chemistry. That was about all we had, though. No intellectual connection whatsoever. He was filled with lust for me on a daily basis and never failed to let me know about it. I felt very desired. But my own sexual drive for him ultimately suffered because I couldn't talk to him about anything important to me. He was intellectually inept. I lost interest in sex with him because, while the sex was great, it was all he had to offer me. So, I'll take this relationship with my husband any day over something like that. We've been together for almost 3 years, and I still lust after him. He still turns me on. And this is a pretty big feat for me. I've never been able to maintain this level of sexual interest in a man for this long. I don't see any end to it either, and that probably has a lot to do with the fact that he isn't all over me all the time. He keeps me wanting. Sometimes the wanting hurts, but it's a good hurt. And the relief, when it comes is generally well worth the wait.