Replies to 'Defining Your Authentic Self'

Hello Teri,

 

I'm new to the message boards here, although i'm a regular visitor of the site. Are you living your authentic self? I finally do!

 

Regards,

 

Jo

I have missed the board too , glad to see you back hope to continue to learn from everybody.

 

Summer is wonderful in Quebec Canada it has been the most wonderful summer since 20 years.Just finishing my 2 weeks vacation and  feeling great .A lot of great things going on in my life, starting with a new house we are buying , an operation that is going to give me a part of a normal life so life is treating me good.Hope you are doing fine too.

 

Nice to be back for a new beginning

 

Sincerly Lyne 

Scared...to live...     I’m scared of speaking my mind,
I'm scared of saying my opion,
I'm scared of telling people they matter to me,
I’m scared of talking to people I want to impress,
I’m scared of getting absolutely drunk,
I’m scared of dancing freely in a club,
I’m scared of showing that I’m enjoying myself,
I'm scared of showing my true emotions
I’m scared of what people will think of me,
I’m scared of giving my everything,
I’m scared of talking to a guy I like,
I’m scared of asking people for favors,
I’m scared of getting hurt,
I'm scared of disappointment,
I'm scared of giving my best,
I'm scared of falling and not getting up again,
I'm scared of not being able to over come these fears,

I’m so scared of failure that I’m afraid to live.   PS: this isn't a suicide note. It's just how I feel because I never feel like I can be my authentic me. I tend to have a face on... just because I'm scared of so many things. I'm starting to read the new book, I hope it can help me on my way of change. I have realized in the past months that III need to change. I used to think "oh when I get older, things will change...", I'm turning 21 next week and things haven't changed. So I guess now it's up to me.

I think that bullying is one of the most dispicable behaviors known to man. Anyone that is in a position of power that is deliberately cruel is evil.

Yet even as a former victim of abuse and long term bullying at school etc... I have come to see how I enabled this behavior. Of course i didn't know I had a right to boundries until i was in my 30s. My first memory is being assaulted by my babysitters husband... i just 'knew' that i had no rights, no say, no strength, no substance and that I deserved to apologze for taking up space and breathing for existing........

I have learnt better and I am now happy to be alive and happy to thrive. I still have a very heard time trusting people and triggers i have to avoid.... but i know that i can ask for help now too....

anyways good luck all keep up the good fight and smile...........breathe........explore..........know that you have the right to exist and BE and be free........

Darlene