Quote From: twrdbalnceI have a sister that cheated with my ex-husband. I suspected it and was told how jealous I was to the point that I felt like something was wrong with me. Kind of funny that I would think like that as my father told me my whole life to "trust my instincts", they are always right.
The truth was driven home one day when my children ages 5, 7, 9 came home from a weekend with their father and asked most innocently, "Mumma....... why does Daddy sleep with Auntie )(*&&%). I didn't know what to say because my reality of intuition and the shock of deception hit me like a ton of bricks yet I knew I had to answer my sweet angels with something not so hateful. All I could think to say was, "because their stupid" , that must have been good enough for them at the time because I've never heard another word about it and they are 24, 26 and 28.
What is kinda funny now is (not really funny) but the kid's think I messed up their lives by leaving the jerk. Any way, I thought I had forgiven my sister............in reality I felt it in words, in deeds and in every day life but I never truly felt it until our father was dying of leukemia. It will be a year on November 27th.
She, along with another sister and I carried our dying father to his bed so he could "hold my mother one more time" although he wasn't really able to I'm sure in his mind he was. We shared and mourned one of the most bittersweet things anyone could. The memory of what happened between her and my ex is now a non-issue.
I can look at my sister as a sweet loving soul who is like me dancing on this earth for a short while. When she went along with my ex she had to be searching, hurting, and hopeless. How can I hate her for that?
I have 2 sisters one, 11 yrs older, one 3 year younger. we lost our Dad when I was 7, my mother remarried and had one more child. we grew up in a very dysfunctional family. we were suppose to be invisable in our house. we were not allowed to participate as a family with my Mom, s-Dad and brother. we were not even allowed to eat with them! you would tthink this would bond my younger sister and I , it did not, we could barley tolerate each other as children and it never really improved, although we have both tried to find that missing sister-hood we haven't. we are in our 60's now!! we've gone years without knowing where the other one lives or how we were! we have tried to help each other out in times of crisis, but we always wound up dissagreeing on something, and shutting down communication. we are very diffrent, with diffrent out looks and feelings about our Mother and family members. I don't know who is wrong or right. but I doubt if we will ever really feel like sisters.
