Quote From: kajunpeach Hi. I am just checking in and reading posts.
my daughter and I had a long talk a few days ago. We have always been so very close so I know this was difficult for her to say to me. She told me that since, (a few years ago), I went to court and got temporary guardianship of her and put her in treatment for 30 days, (which we all know is not nearly long enough), that she no longer trusts me. She goes to a counselor, but not one that is a specialitst with eating disorders. The work she is doing also involves a group therapy session. For her to tell me that the trust is gone between herself and her family was very difficult for her to say.
However, I knew that she felt that way. She has let me know in other situations that I took control away from her over her own life and that she would never ever go back to inpatient treatment.
So glad you checked in..I was getting concerned. Look at the bright side of this she sat
down and talked to you. A while back she wasn't even doing that. So I think progress is
being made. You have to find the good stuff inside the bad stuff other wise its going to
totally consume you. And I think the wall of trust/no trust is starting to come down It
may be brick by brick, but thats OK. It wasn't built over night so give everything time
to settle down and smooth out.
With Thanksgiving coming up, you might want to write her a letter telling her how thankful
you are for HER. Don't go into the bad stuff, just tell her you are thankful she is YOUR daughter
and a member of your family. Tell her how big her heart is and how you want to have a loving
close relationship with her. You might do the same thing with your grand-daughter and even
your husband and sons. Let them know how special they are to you and how your world would
not be the same without them in it. A letter is something tangible they can hold on to tuck into
their wallets and go back and read when times get rough. You may not always be right there
with them, but at those time they can pull out that letter and suddenly there are your words....
words only a mom/wife/ or grandmother can say and feel.
This might be something you add to your Thanksgiving traditions. Because Thanksgiving is
more than turkey and ham, parades and foot ball game and Uncle Ed sprawled out on the sofe
snoring because he ate too much.
Tell the people you love how much they mean to you, you never know when tragedy is going to
strike and someone may die or be permanently injured. I think that is probably what your entire
family needs to hear right now. That each of them are special and you cherish them forever
Let me know how things progress OK
Brenda
bmitchell@centurytel.net
