Replies to '11/24 Great School Debate'

The biggest gap, I found, was they had no idea how to behavior with other people,how to get along with peers, how to fit  into a schedule, daily, and how to survive without mom.

 

I disagree. 

 

They have more trouble fitting in with their classmates in SCHOOL because they're not privy to the pecking order set up since kindergarten.  They're not privy to the school nonsense that defines the school.  And don't tell me that your other students welcome these kids with open arms and don't dismiss them as 'weird'.  I'm sure they think they're aliens as they've never been in such a cliquish setting before.  And this is bad because....?

they need to be denied their needs sometimes, so that they will be able to adapt to stressful situations, and they need to have parents, not friends.

Totally, TOTALLY disagree here.  I think the biggest disservice parents do to their kids is purposely NOT MEET THEIR NEEDS even in infancy.  No, I'm not talking about denying them food, shelter, clothing, or even love.  I'm talking about making a tiny infant sleep alone down the hall in a crib.  To be bottlefed instead of nursed (as a choice, not because nursing didn't work out).  To deny needs for comfort and tell the kids to 'toughen up' or 'just get over it' from a young age.

 

Children who have their needs met (with parents who TRUST THEIR CHILDREN to KNOW WHAT THEY NEED) are more secure, content, and independent than the children denied their needs.  They're not NEEDY.  Go figure.

 

As far as respect, have you ever been around a child who is trusted and respected as the human being that they are?  I'd guess not.  But, remember the old adage 'you reap what you sow'?  Amazing what happens when you respect your kids.  They, in turn, respect and trust YOU.  Fancy that.

 

I treat my children with trust, respect, and kindness, like guests in my home.  After all, they didn't choose to be born.  And I have kids that are kind, helpful, compassionate, and respectful, who trust me when I have to make a decision without their input (which is rare but happens). 

 

You can't see that until you've experienced it. 

I was unable to see the show today because  there was a  football game  on our local station.  I will tell you it was teachers like you who convinced me of the need to homeschool my son. "They need to be denied their needs sometimes"?  What kind of monster would deny the needs of their child?  Their wants, yes, but a parents first responsibility is to make sure their childs needs are met.  My homeschooled son has learned quite nicely how to "survive without mom", as was evident when he spent 10 days in South America last December.  I will agree with you that children should not be automatically given the same respect as adults.  Respect is something that is earned not just given away.  You may have had homeschoolers who had problems with crossover, but how much of it was due to your bias of homeschooling families?  Most "professional educators" have a chip on their shoulders about homeschooling.  When we choose to homeschool it is because we feel it is in our children's best interest, not because we don't think you are capable.  As far as your opinion that homeschoolers won't be able to function in the "real world" when my son graduated high school at 16 and took his college entrance exams he scored quite high, and he will be graduation college with a degree, so you don't have to worry about him being a "welfare recipient with a sence of entitlement".  I have, however seen that attitude from many of my son's friends who are still in the public school system just being passed along because teachers don't want to "damage their self esteem" by holding them back.