Quote From: lowcanuckI have been struggling w/depression ever since I can remember. I am 30, married w/ three beautiful children....healthy, a nice home and I am able to stay at home and care for them. I know that something w/me is not right and that my thoughts, actions and blow-ups are not normal or safe. I hate the person that I become when I get into these "rutts". I am just not happy and most days I have the "what's the point" attitude. I have seen counselors and therapist and I am well educated in the natural, homeopathic modalities as well as the nutritional aspects that come w/depression. I read books, I take classes and I seek out all, or most avenues to be a better person, but nothing seems to stick or work. What is wrong w/me? How do I live life like it is my last day w/out it actually being the last day. Or enjoy what I do have w/out having to lose it all. And.....and this is a big one.....w/out meds?
Do you know if there is a history of depression in your family?
You are the strongest female role model that your children will ever have. Everything you do and say is being recorded and ‘normalized’ in their brains. That means that their mom’s ‘what’s the point” attitude is a normalized part of life, it is how they see you living most days.
You said that you’ve seen counselors, how did that work for you? If you didn’t ‘click’ with your therapist, I urge you to try again with a new therapist. (I’ve been there) It is possible that nothing seems to stick or work for you because when you are depressed, it is difficult to be a consistent person; to change behaviors you must be consistent. That is why I recommend a therapist, because a professional could guide you towards being consistent with your cognitive behaviors.
You probably already know that exercise can be helpful when you are in a depressed state. Many people deal with depression with therapy and exercise, but if medication is necessary, please know there is nothing wrong with that. It isn’t a character flaw on your part. You deserve to live a happy, healthy and fully functioning life.
