Replies to 'Living Together'

Quote From: ashley91

I have been dating my boyfriend for 15 months. I am 32 and he is 41. I was married once, for 3 years. He's never been married. My relationship with him is 10x's better than my marriage. We have told each other we love each other, and since our first date, have spent every weekend together. Last year, he invited me back home with him for 2 weeks, for Christmas. After our one year mark passed, I asked him if he saw a future for us. He told me he would be upfront (as he was when we first started dating, but I wasn't thinking marriage then anyway),  that he didn't feel like he needed to get married. His reasons are: He's already 41, set in his ways, he's afraid of disappointing, financial reasons, doesn't think he's good at sex, and thinks he would irritate another person by his living habits of staying up late, spending time alone. When I told him that HE is making the decision for ME by saying that, he said he never thought of it that way, and opened his mind to my statement. His mom left him, his sister and brother when they were 8, 10, and 12. They were raised by their father, seeing their mother once in a while. His two siblings are now married, but only within the last 4 years. When I asked him if living together is out of the question, he said no, definitely not. He lives alone and is struggling financially. He said all he thinks about is work and how he can try to get it together. He is always talking about things for us to do in the future like visiting his family, going fishing, etc. We have a beautiful, respectful relationship. He is the most gentle man I've ever met and he always validates my feelings. We never fight. We may have a slight argument, but we handle it maturely. He is the most honest man I've ever met as well. He's very sweet and shy. I love him so much it hurts. My question is: What is your opinion on everything I've told you? This relationship is too good and too precious to me to throw away, just because my concerns about us ever getting married are in my head. I don't even know if this worry is being caused by the pain of my first marriage not working out. I'm just confused.