Replies to 'Spanking: Useful or Cruel?'

Well, I thought I posted a message earlier today but evidently I didn't LOL. Whatever the case, I don't see it here so hopefully I am not repeating myself. It sounds to me like you are a very angry victim of abuse and that you are bitter and unforgiving which is something that I personally do understand as I have had the same sort of feelings and hate as well. If you have not already, I would reccomend some good counseling and don't stop seeking help til you are fully healed of all this. It is possible to love and to be happy even in a world of turmoil and violence, It is possible to get beyond the anger that you seem to be feeling and it is possible to forgive others for their trespasses and to live life to it's fullest. It doesn't mean that you forget what people has done or said to harm you and it doesn't mean that you have to trust them and make them your best friend, but what it does mean is that you have prooved to them as well as yourself that you are worthy to love and to be loved and respected and that you can live a happy and fullfilling life even though they have tried everything in their power to destroy you. As far as I am concerned, my abusers have eaten dust and unless they have asked for forgiveness and changed their life style according to the way God intended it to be, they will pay for their deeds but I refuse to be dragged down with them. Abuse is a horrible ordeal for any one to have to go through and I agree that children can and will carry it over to adulthood and with out the care, love, and help that they need, chances are they too will become abusers, but with the right help and guidance they can become achievers and I thank God that I am who I am today and that He has helped me through the ordeals and most of all, I am thankful that I am not an abuser that my children are well mannered and happy kids, we love and care for each other in our home and it certainly shows. Whether a parent spanks or not is not the determination on how their children will turn out but how they have raised their kids and whether or not their kids were loved, respected and disciplined in a way that will teach and guide them through this life and of course by the choices that they will make as they will have free will of choice on how they live their lives. I am not perfect but I am the best parent for my children and maybe someday you will feel confident enough in your self to know how imporant you are and that you have great value and potential and much to offer others. I certainly will pray for you that you can get the help and healing that it sounds like you need. And I am being very sincere here, I sense that you are not a happy person becasue of abuse in your life..........................