Quote From: midlife2Husband divorced me 2 yrs ago after 25 yrs together.H is 54, I am 58.-no kids He lost money in the market in '01, hated his job, his father (a shaky relationship) died suddenly in '02. Husband began an affair with an acquaintance of mine. I introduced them. 2 weeks later she spent the weekend in my house while I was out of town taking care of my elderly mother. Woman declared undying love for my husband and promptly kicked her husband out of her house (her 3rd) and started divorce proceedings. I discovered affair 3 mos later. Tried to hold marriage together but it was too far gone. I apparently had been sleepwalking thru the marriage. H started drinking again after 17 yrs of not drinking, got heavily into porn, and internet chat rooms. The once gentle affectionate man began to act like a bipolar Jekyll and Hyde. We continued to live in the same house for nearly a year after I discovered affair. I asked him to leave twice and he refused. (Then found out there was nothing legally I could do about that). I read Divorcebusting and The Divorce Remedy and other books and remained clam while he lived in another state 1/2 of the week and with me 1/2 of the week. His boss was cooperating with this arrangement. H filed for divorce and was extremely ugly blaming me loudly all of the way saying very cruel things to me. It was a terrible time. My H was very depressed --mother and father both were diagnosed with bi polar disorder. H's father never was treated and led a doulbe life as long as I knew him.I'm single nearly 2 yrs now and thanks to good therapists am feeling very good. Our marriage was the first for both of us. H wrote last year that he didn't know what happened to him. He remains with the other woman (her 4th marriage at age 50) And may I add, she is a therapist. I wrote last year to the show asking for consideration of the topic of men's midlife crisis-depression etc. Michelle Davis and Jed Diamond have been two comforting sources for me. Additionally ,the husband of a friend of mine committed suicide the same year. No outward signs of depression and seemingly was very togehter. No marital or helath problems. He was same age as my H. It feels like an epidemic.
Based on the Dr P boards there is an epidemic. And bipolar was my first thought.
I have to wonder WHY a guy chooses his wife's friend to screw. And in your home yet. Too lazy to look for another?
Yeah, hoochie was on the hunt and ex is gonna have tons of fun being divorce #4. Another male failing. If she has slept with everyone else in the state, she's the one he wants. DUH
Yep, if his name is on the house in my state he cannot be forced to leave.
You sound like a very strong lady and I will take your source recommendations to heart. Thanks.
