Quote From: dex1977I too have resently seperated. My husband left our family in March 2005. It has been so hard on all of us. Kids(12 and 9) Sept. will be our 15th year of marriage. I dion't understand how he can say he still loves me but does not want to be with me. What does all this mean? I am comitted to my marriage. He said he would not take off his wedding ring and then the very next week he did take it off. I am trying to move on with my life but it is a long hard ride. I take things one day at a time but some days are soooo hard. How am I supposed to act around him? What does he want from me? How can I be just friends with him when I want more? I have so many questions and I don't know where to get answers. I can say that I put my marriage in the Lord's hands, because I just don't know what else to do. I can't fix our marriage by myself.
Any advise would be helpful. Thanks.
dex77@nc.rr.com
Hubby probably has someone waiting in the wings. Not really sure she wants him or she is married too so the winds change every week. This means he wants to have his cake and eat it too. Great deal for him. Hell for you and the kids.
I do not think you owe him ANY of your time. Find something else to do. No affair though. Exercise, volunteer, dinner with friends, something like that. Get a third party to assist with connecting him and the kids, if he has the time. Keep conversations short and relevant. Do not wander down memory lane. You need emotional and physical distance if you are to heal. And when you quit being so available hubby will be very shocked. He is counting on your good nature to keep his options open.
You will never have all the answers you want. Don't think he knows himself. Yes, it is a long ride. Two years at least.
No, you cannot fix your marriage alone and must face the fact that your husband may not really want to help. Faith will be your greatest asset.
