Replies to 'Your Family Legacy'

     I have been married 17 years to a wonderful man.  The point is that his father is a child molester.  A sick pervert.  In 1994 he was arrested on 12 counts of sexual assault and abuse and rape of his then 11 and 12 year old daughters.  My hubby and I lived about 50 feet behind them and he was not married to the girls mother.  For three years or better they lived in pure hell.  All the while my husbands father was physically abusive to all of us.  He tried to hurt my husband several times he had a temper that would not quit.  When in 1994 he got his self arrested my husband and I did not know how to cope with this, it was like a mack truck had ran over us.  We could not even breathe.  We were told by the courts that we could not go anywhere near those girls and we were threatened by law that we would be arrested.  In 95 we sold everything that we could and tried to move away but it did not help with the rage and pain that we felt because our then 2 year old son was around this man all the ti,me.  We were scared to death that something had happened to our precious son also.  My husband started drinking heavily to cope with the pain and got lost in it.  He kept saying that he wanted to die because he could not take the shame that he felt because of what his father had done.  Everyone around town including my family judged us by what his dad had done.  What they didn't understand was that IF WE HAD KNOWN WHAT HE WAS DOING HE WOULD NEVER HAVE WENT TO TRIAL. He WOULD HAVE BEEN KILLED.  that IS ALL THERE IS TO IT.  people LIKE THAT DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE.  SINCE THAT TIME WE HAVE LOST EVERYTHING MY HUSBAND LOST THE ABILITY TO GO OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR YEARS.  He POINTED GUNS AT HIS HEAD BECAUSE OF THE PAIN.  finally HE STARTED WRITING TO HIS FATHER R AND MOTHER ABOUT ALL THE THINGS THAT THEY HAD DONE TO HIM AND HIS SIBLINGS.  He WROTE LETTER UPON LETTER SCREAMING OUT AT HIS PARENTS.  He HAS NO CONTACT WITH ANY OF HIS SIBLINGS BECAUSE THEY ARE SUFFERING THE SAME THING HE DID AND DO NOT HAVE ANYONE TO HELP.  and THEY WONT EXCEPT ANY HELP FROM THEIR BROTHER BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE HIS FATHER.  IT IS NOT HIS FAULT THAT HIS FATHER DID THESE HORRIBLE THINGS AND THAT IS WHAT YOUR KIDS NEED TO HEAR.  if YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW DETAILS HAVE THEM WRITE THEM DOWN ON PAPER.  THEY HAVE TO DO THIS TO GET ALL THE RAGE AND ANGER AND HURT OUT.  YOU HAVE TO SUPPORT YOUR KIDS IN THIS AND I KNOW THAT IT IS HARD BUT YOU HAVE TO LET THEM KNOW THAT YOU LOVE THEM AND WILL HELP THEM OUT IN ANYWAY YOU CAN  .  I SUGGEST THAT YOU GO TO COUNSELING IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY WITH THEM AND EACH OF YOU GO ALONE TO.  IT HAS TO BE A JOINT THING FOR YOU ALL TO GET PAST THIS.  BELIEVE ME IT IS HARD BUT YOU CANT GIVE UP.  BUT THEY HAVE TO COME TO YOU.  MAYBE YOU COULD SUGGEST THE WRITING.  TELL THEM TO KEEP A JOURNAL OR DIARY OF WHAT THEIR FEARS AND FEELINGS ARE AND WERE AT THOSE TIMES.  IF THEY HOLD IT IN IT WILL ONLY MAKE THEM WORSE.  I FEEL FOR ALL OF YOU.  MY HEART BROKE AS I READ THIS STORY.  FOR A MINUTE I WAS BACK THERE IN 1994 WHEN OUR LIFE REALLY CHANGED.  I KNOW THAT YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUT IF YOU NEED TO TALK JUST E-MAIL ME I WILL TRY TO HELP YOU.  HAVE YOU CONFRONTED THIS SICKO YET?  YOU SHOULD TELL HIM ALL YOUR FEELINGS TOO IT WILL HELP I WATCHED MY HUSBAND GO THROUGH HELL  TRYING TO COPE DAY TO DAY.  I DON'T KNOW THAT IT EVER GOES AWAY BUT IT DOES GET WEAKER AFTER YOU CONFRONT THE PERVERT.  WE HAVE SAID SOME BAD THINGS TO MY HUSBANDS FATHER AND WE HAVE NO CONTACT WITH ANY OF OUR FAMILIES.  PLEASE FOR YOUR CHILDREN'S AND YOUR SAKE CONFRONT THIS THING IT WILL EAT YOU UP INSIDE AND CONSUME YOUR LIFE IF YOU DON'T.  YOU CAN ALSO KEEP UP WITH THIS FREAK TOO ON THE NET HE SHOULD HAVE HIS OWN WEBSITE NOW. JUST LIKE MY FATHER IN LAW.  LIKE I SAID IF YOU NEED TO TALK PLEASE WRITE ME I WILL BE HERE FOR YOU I CAN SYMPATHIZE WITH YOU