Replies to 'Pros and Cons of Gastric Bypass Surgery'

Hi Queenie.... You really do need to go and talk to someone about what is disrupting your life.  You should go and see a therapist so that you can talk to someone impartial and you don't have to tell anyone that you are going.  Life had it's many ups and downs and sometimes we just need that little bit of help to get us through.  You do not have to be ashamed or embarrased.  Just admit to yourself that you need some help and go and get it.  You may even require some medication to help you through this, but don't wait.  Go and get some help before you get past the point of no return.  You are not a fraud.  You are human and you just need some help at this time in your life.  Just think about what you have accomplished in your life.  You LOST 100 lbs...That is fantastic.  You have a good job that is excellent.  Go and see someone about this NOW.  Pick up the phone and make an appointment.  You can do it and you can stop drinking and you will be happy about yourself again, but you have to start somewhere! 

 I can tell you that losing weight only changes your physical aspect. It does not fix any phychological issues that one may have. The insecurities that come with being overweight do not go away, the source of insecurity just changes or new ones develop. I learned this the hard way.I myself at one time, found myself drinking too much and did not like the person I was becoming. I had to come to terms with the fact that I had other things that I was trying to escape from and realized I needed help. I had to see a therapist for a while.  Life throws a great deal of unexpected changes our ways. Traumas occur. The surgery is an extreme change in your life and it you had other things that occured at the time of your recovery, it compounds all the stress is compounded. You are not a fraud, you are human and you deserve to cut yourself some slack. You have many options and you are not alone. Take strength in your weight loss accomplisment and in the wonderful family that I am sure you have. There is no shame in reaching out for help. Take care and God Bless.

Hi Queenie - this is my first time on here.  Your message touched me very deeply.  I am overweight and hoping to have the surgery at somepoint.  However, that is not what my message is about. 

 

Please, do NOT feel ashamed of yourself or guilty for your drinking.  You have made the first step, the BIGGEST step...you have admitted that you have a problem.  I know that it may be the hardest thing you'll ever do, but I do believe you need to talk to your husband.  He must love you dearly.  He stuck by you through your weight loss, and I'm sure at times your emotions from that were not the most pleasant.  You have to trust him; trust that he can handle what you have to tell him.  Trust that he loves you enough to help you.  Trust yourself to be strong enough to take the step towards him.  You did it for your weight loss, do it for the drinking.  I watched my brother's life turn to pot from his alcohol.  He virtually lost everything because he didn't see a problem.  He even turned to crime.  Don't let that happen to you.  You have the strength necessary to beat this thing. 

 

I want you and everybody else reading this to think about one thing; it's one thing that nobody every says but in my mind is so very true.  A smoker can quit smoking and never have to look at another cigarette again.  An alcoholic can stop drinking and never take another sip again.  A gambler can walk away from a casino and never gamble again.  But tell me this, can an overeater walk away from food and never eat again?  Something to think about.  My point is, you conquered the food addiction, I KNOW you can walk away from the alcohol. 

 

Tragedy has a tendency to turn us to things we choose to use at crutches.  Instead of dealing with the loss or grief from a situation, we try to cover it up.  Please don't smother yourself with that crutch.  Stop drinking!  Tell your husband!  Get some help!  I will pray for you, promise!

     Your quote brought back memories. I did the same thing, I started drinking to cope. That was over 10 years ago I quite. I was afraid to tell anyone or get help because I am a professional and I didn't want people to know how screwed up I was. I felt alone and cryed all the time. I ended up in a recovery center because it took me to deep levels where I hope you don't have to go. I refused to go to AA because I was afraid to see someone who knew me. Well, things worsened and I finally was forced to go. It was the best thing I ever did as far as make positive changes, it taught me so much, the 12 step program. I had such pride and ego that it was killing me. I had to get humble to save myself from suicide because I was headed in that direction. You are not alone. The first step is to admit it and deal with it. Its funny but everyone already knew, they were just waiting for me to step out and say it.