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Replies to 'The Meaning of "Family"'
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March 9, 2007, 11:40 pm PST
 Quote From: ricschic You said in your last sentence that there is nothing you can do for her. Your mother said it herself...you're there for her to talk to. Sometimes that's enough. Sometimes it isn't. If you can talk to her honestly, tell her you WANT to do something, but you're reliant upon her to tell you what it is that you can do. Even if it's to help pay for someone to come in and clean house for your mother, cook some meals, etc...to help to ease the household burden while she cares for the loved ones. Your mother sounds like one helluva woman, and you sound like a loving and caring daughter. You recognize and appreciate all that your mother's given over the years to everyone. It's only natural that you want to give something back. But unless she TELLS you what it is that you can do, you're going to have to take her at her word that a phone call is enough. Unless maybe you could visit on the weekends to give her a much-needed break? Maybe you could contact the American Cancer Society, and ask if there is any assistance to be had for your mother. Maybe they have volunteers, etc. that can help out with the transportation, etc. with the loved ones. Good luck...I lost my mother when I was 12 to cancer. She was only 46. Your mother is a remarkable woman, and she needs to know that...though I betcha she doesn't think of herself that way. My prayers are with you and your family..... You were very thoughtful in your response to my predicament. Not exactly an eloquent way to put it, but it is, indeed, a predicament. The latest news is that the tumors have invaded dad's liver and bile ducts. The prognosis is even more grim than last week. He has maybe a few months, at best. My mom does have a housekeeper. My mother does earn a good living and can meet expenses. That, in itself is a blessing right now. I have simply made myself available for whatever they need me for. This weekend, I'm keeping their adopted grandson so that they can go spend a night alone, without my grandmother, without kids. Just to reconnect, maybe for the last time. She continues to tell her that I am the only one with whom she can really let down with, as she tried to be strong for them. I get the tears she cannot shed elsewhere. Would if I could, take the burden myself. But we can only do so much. The rest is in the hands of someone more wise than we. I just wanted to thank you for your kind and thoughtful ideas. I am so sorry you lost your mother at such a young age. I am truly blessed to have had mine for so many years. Thank you again. |
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