Replies to '03/09 Dominating Spouses'

Many women who get into these abusive relationships were abused as children and/or had mothers who were abused, so they think this is the normal husband/wife dynamic.  Some women think they can change the guy once the ring is on the finger, and it just doesn't happen.  Some women think that the honeymoon period when the guy apologizes perfusely is sincere, and the tension builds and he does it again.  Some women simply aren't strong enough to break the cycle and tell the guy to  get out and not let the door hit his fat butt on the way out.  There are a plethora of reasons why women end up in these situations-very sad.

I believe women get into these relationships because they know that the man will take care of them financially. So they do it for security reasons. Unfortunately, most men who don't want their wives to work are very controlling. Apparently, she was pregnant with her second child, so she married him for security. He is right about the Bible Verse, but he has taken it out of content. Men are suppose to love their wives as Christ loved the church. That means they are to respect them as well.  If he turns around and loves and respects her, then she will be more willing to keep the house clean, and do all the things around the house that he wants done. It is not too much for him to ask her to do these things since she doesn't work, but he also needs to give her respect. If he is verbally abusive to her, then she is only going to rebel and not do what is required of her.

You have made good points.

 

Some women do NOT know about the man's real personality until after they are married and then feel compelled to "fix" things or try to work it out.

 

Abusive men don't like or will not stand for assertive women.

 

So the women acquiesce to get along....to keep the peace.

 

Not right, but it happens as we all know.