Message Boards
Replies to 'Cheated On'
|
March 29, 2007, 9:19 am PDT
 Quote From: beckyleigh My husband and I were separated for approximately 6 months. During this time we had absolutely no contact with each other, not verbal, written or otherwise. We are now back together and the separation does seem to have done some good. Seems that he realized what he lost when I was gone, and so far all is well on the homefront. My dilemma right now is that one of the women that he dated while we were separated has continued to send him text messages and calls his cell phone. He has been open and honest about this and has even let me read them and check his phone activity. He has repeatedly told her to leave him alone and stop sending messages. His replies have read that he loves his wife is back at home and to leave him alone. I told him to simply stop responding at all and that she would eventually stop. It has been nearly 3 months now and it is still going on. Should I respond to her messages now? I think that because she knows the situation that now it is involving me and I should tell her to back off and be gone. What do you think? My husband says to let him handle it and that he does not think I should call her at all. He thinks she will eventually stop.
That is what my hubby said, but I responded to her emails to let her know that I was aware of the activity and her persistence. He didn't want me to do such a thing and discouraged it, but I did it anyway for my own peace of mind.
She knew my husbands weakness, but she didn't know the woman behind the man. I really think it turned her off. She first started spamming me with all kinds of letters etc. he wrote, but it was all old news already. I was aware of the love affair and was willing to accept it for that and move on. If the shoe were on the other foot and I was the "other woman", I would hate being told by the wife to back off, I would feel insulted, I would move on, but that's me. I cannot speak for everyone.
I basically told her to get a grip on reality, what she claimed was hers is wearing my wedding ring, exchanged wedding vows with me, has given me his ring to wear and has never asked for it back. He lives in a home with me, we have a child together that he loves tremulously, and he is here day after day. Laughing with me, planning life and future with me, so he maybe a bit lost, that doesn't make him hers. I told her that if she really "loves him" she would put herself in his shoes and realize how confusing this all is for him, and how difficult she is making it. She wouldn't accept having someone pulling on her hubby's heart strings while he is committed to her. Of course she came back with, "he was the aggressor, he told me he is only with you because of the child you have together". Fine let him wait until the "child" has left home, and then you can have him. In the meantime he has made a commitment to be a family and it doesn't allow for extramarital affairs. I hope you will be able to figure it out. I think you have a right to stand up for yourself and it if feel threatened you have the right to eliminate the threat.
I guess you would need to be prepared to hear things from her that you may not want to hear. |
|
Return to the Message Board
