Replies to '03/29 Cougars and Sugar Daddies'

I married at eighteen to a man twenty one years older. It was a huge mistake. Regardless of the fact we wound up making it work, which required a much greater level of emotional strength and maturity than this young woman exhibited on the show, it was still a huge mistake! I did not stand a chance against his much greater experience and was controlled and manipulated for many years. My husband was protective and never would have sat there like a lump on a stone while a "friend" bashed me on national television!! The fact Sanjay did so speaks volumes to me. If this very young girl, and that is exactly what she is, a girl, not a woman, is unable to even comprehend the ramifications of his screaming silence while his "friend" character assassinated her in such a public forum, she is much too young to survive what is to come. How any "grown" man, (still speaking of this so called "friend") can actually lay the full blame on the shoulders of a child is beyond me! Obviously, this "friend" hates women, what I call a "woman hater". It disgusted me to listen to him abuse this young girl. The person with sole responsibility is Sanjay and if he does get taken for a financial ride, he has only himself to blame.

I loved my husband and lost him to disease. We had three lovely children together. However, I know he took advantage of my lack of experience and manipulated and controlled me like the well experienced and worldly man he was. I have explained to my children if I had it to do all over again I would never choose a much older man (or woman). It is a different story all together when both are mature adults!! Not when one is still a child, for crying out loud!! My children lost their father at seven and ten because I was with a man so much  older. I laid deep emotional pain and scars on their little innocent souls which could have been avoided had I not been with a man over twenty years my senior. It is unfair to not only the young teen here, but any children they have together. While anyone can die at any time, the likelihood of this twenty some year older man of dying much sooner is significantly higher than the children losing their young mother. There are many more considerations here than simply these two, or four people.

Jacquelynn, please dear, consider how your children will be affected by the loss of their father at such a tender age. Even if he survives their childhoods, they still face losing their father at an age when young adults still need parental units. Think of your grandchildren too. Children need extended family, and when you enter a long term relationship with such an older person the risk of losing him/her is much greater than if you married a man nearer your age. This is not just about you!! My children suffered tremendous grief which affected their emotional stability and had horrendous consequences on their teenage years. It still affects them negatively. My daughter knows first hand the terrible price children pay when parents have a huge age difference. If you think for one moment it is worth securing their financial future, think again. No amount of money can make up for the loss of a parent, no amount of financial security can wipe away tears, or put back together the rent in little souls. The affect will last the rest of their lives. If you think for one moment this can't happen to your future children then your ability to "see" the future is extremely limited. I am not putting you down, just speaking from my own personal experience.

I wish you all the best, but for crying out loud, at least pause a moment and take a good look at what people here are trying to tell you. Most here really are taking the effort because they actually care! Yes, it is possible to care about people you do not have a relationship with.