Replies to '08/13 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace'

Wow this looks like a stressful show they are about to air. But I 100% agree with you, DNA means nothing when something like this has happened. Its not like the grandparents let the kids stay up late, molesting a child is one of a few horrible crimes you can do to a child, and that should never be over looked.

 I agree, Family means nothing in this case. It only makes it far worst than if it had been a stranger.
Grandpa knew what he was doing and the consequences of his actions long before he even acted on his perverted thoughts and lust.
He was not thinking of her welfare at any time only his lust.He has violated a sacred trust placed in him not only by his grand daughter but also by his Children. He does NOT deserve a place in this young girls life EVER AGAIN.
She has been tramatised for LIFE. This is no longer about him or what he feels or wants or needs. This is all about the little girl (the Victim) and she is entitled to feel safe and seeing him again and being around him will not do that.  
Grandpa has done physical time in jail. How long is your daughter's sentence? do you believe it will be over for her in a few months? Because he has served physical time in prison and says he is sorry it should be alright and she must forgive and forget and go on as if her little life has not been changed for life?
HOW DEAR THEY EVEN THINK OF WANTING A REALATIONSHIP WITH HER AGAIN AFTER WHAT THEY HAVE DONE?
If her parents decide to let it pass and feel he has done his time, Here is a word of advice.
Has you Daughter recovered from her ordeal? Will YOU ever trust to leave her or any young child in BOTH their care and not second guess if it will happen again?

Let him deal with his guilt and sorrow. Let you little girl know she is safe and NEVER the two shall meet again.
As for Grandma, She should have been thrown in jail as well and be on the sex offender registry as well because by keeping silent she was protecting a child molester.

One very angry Mama

I agree.

 

I was molested by two different family members when I was a small child. I was lied to after I left the family and was adopted by new parents. My former family told my new family a few years later that the molesters had passed away(one did). They were both rather old, so this was easy to believe but denied me my right to confront them about their abuse as well as attempt prosecution.  A few years later I received a christmas letter from my former mother, and she was talking about how she had divorced and moved in with her family in wyoming. She had a young daughter and she was living with this man again! I could not believe that, first of all, he was still alive and second...that knowing he had molested me for years and confessed to it, she would bring another girl into his life that was the same age!

 

Now many more years later as an adult, if I had recieved this information now instead of back then I would hire a private detective to track down the new address (since she didn't include it in the christmas letter) and I would have pressed charges or done something  to get that girl away from a mother who obviously was endangering her by moving in with a pedaphile. Family or no family, NO ONE has the right to molest children. NO ONE who has ever molested a child should ever ever ever be allowed back around children and most especially a molester should never be allowed around their young victims again. 

 

 

The fact that the grandmother (from  the show) knew about the abuse and didn't report it, means that you can not trust this person to have the best intrests of the child. How can anyone even think of bringing either of these people back into their family and life?

 

I am going to watch the show today. I have always tried to keep from pre-judging people and I always attempt to see things from both sides with compassion and understanding. However, from what was written about this show...it seems rather straightforward. A family wants to allow a molester to come back into their lives. From what I understand, a child was abused, the abuser was arrested convicted and is now a registered sex offender. What possible reason could you have for wanting to have that person in your life? Compassion for this poor child is very easy, understanding the parents is going to be harder.

I can't even imagine letting the abuser back into a child's life, EVER.  Children are vulnerable and I think that if you're the parent, and you don't keep the abuser away, the child's trust in you has been compromised. 

 

I think it's abusing that child further to bring that person back into the child's life, and even neglect NOT to get them counseling to cope with what happened.  To expose the child to further possible assault is just awful.

 

My name is Ginny, I posted earlier, but I read the above comment and related to what she stated, about her self worth being in question when her perpetrator was allowed back into her life. I feel much the same way, because when I cried out for help, my parents, and I blame my mother the most, for not protecting me. I recall that she was the dominant parent, so perhaps that's why I blame her the most. She more or less controlled the home. Because I saw that my daddy really didn't want to leave me alone, for some reason, I don't blame him as much.

I also feel like doing to my brother what I read earlier from another. I feel like confronting him, throwing him down on the ground, and cutting off his penis and fingers that he used to fondle me with and stick up me. I don't want to kill him, I want him to remember everything I would like to do to him and I would like it to be slow and tortuous. Then, he could go to jail. I may go to after doing that, but I heard they had good libraries in there and I really don't give a damn.

Different things seem to trigger my memory and this show triggered it. Society seems to view a victim of abuse with distain, like come on, get over it. A lot of worse things could have happened to you. I know that. God has Blessed me abundantly and I recoginize that. I have so many things to be thankful for and I am. However, having said that, it doesn't lessen the pain, or cause my mind to wander and feel sad because my mama didn't love me enough to protect me. I hate myself. I feel like "The Woman At The well" in the Bible. People tend to not accept divorced women anyhow, plus I feel like I'm nothing. I have always seemed to pick the wrong man so now I find myself isolated. I don't feel like anyone cares about me. I'm talking frankly on here because it's anonymous. If I was talking directly to a person, they would either think I was a nut, or get sick and tired of listening to me. Well all I can say is my molestation has contributed to who and where I'm at today. Again, I will say that it wasn't so much the molestation that has bothered me, but the fact that my protector, my mama didn't help me when I cried out. I can still deal with my brother and I will. Until he is 6' under, I will still have my chance to confront him. I despise him. No telling how many people he has molested. Dr Phil, first of all Grace needs to feel that she has a protector and she must feel safe.

She needs to be far away from the grandparents, and if her father doesn't recognize by not giving attention to his daughter's emotional needs instead of being concerned about his "DADDY", then his little girl will grow up with having problems with forming healthy male relationships throughout her life. He in my opinion is no better than his "DADDY". Mama, get your daughter the hell away from all of them.

Let her know at a young age, that this type of behavior is not acceptable. Let her know that she can trust you. God Bless Grace.

Ginny

How awfull for you. If something were ever to happen to my children there would be no way I would let the bad person back in our lives ever. Your right DNA means nothing.

I also was sexually abused as a child more than once from several abusers and it just led right up into my teens. No one listened when I told them the first time so I kept quiet about it from there on out. This is abusive for the grandmother not to believe her grandchild that the grandfather abused her which is exactly what happened to me the first time. I was told to "stay away from my grandfather." ha! What is a five year old suppose to do to stay away from a adult? 

My grand daughter came to us and told us that a teenage boy of 16 was hurting her, it took her many months to open up to tell us for she was threatened by the abuser and the abusers Aunt as we found out later on. Our grand daughter was only 3 at the time . We took steps immediately to insure her safety!  Which grace's grandmother did nothing!  Shame on her!

I would not allow my child around this man again if I were grace's parents whether he was related or not, it is not safe!  I thank God that this little girl had the courage to tell her mother and father what happened to her even after her grandmother didn't believe her, way to go grace!  Way to go grace's parents for keeping her safe from this pervert! For not allowing DNA to get in the way of this very difficult situation.

 

I THINK WHEN YOUR GRAND FATHER WILL MOLEST HIS OWN GRANDDAUGHTER ,HE DOES NOT DESERVE TO GRAND FATHER ANY CHILD , AS DR PHIL SAYS PAST BEHAVIOR DETERMINES THE FURTURE. NOT ONLY THAT ,A GRAND FATHER GUIDES  AND PROTECTS

HIS CHILDREN AND GRAND CHILDREN, TO HAVE YOUR OWN GRAND MOTHER NOT TELL

ANYONE THAT IS A DOUBLE  GRAND PARENTING PRIVILEGE TAKEN,  THEY BOTH HAVE RUINED  HER LIFE  AS FAR AS LIVING A NORMAL LIFE I THINK  THEY BOTH SHOULD BE KEPTED AWAY FROM CHILDREN SHE CAN ADOPT A GRANDFATHER+ GRAND MOTHER

THAT WILL TREAT HER BETTERTHEN THAT . SMIELY

 I dont care who the person was that molested a or any child they the pediphiles or rapist should never be allowed back or  to ever have access to that childs life! There  IS NO CURE OR FORGIVENESS  FOR THESE DISEASES!!!! NO PUNISHMENT  OR SENTENCE WILL EVER be good enough! I wish they would put all PROVEN molestors and rapists out or OUR misery!