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Replies to 'Defining Your Authentic Self'

 
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Stressed

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embarrassed
July 27, 2005, 11:59 am PDT

Marcia...

Quote From: marcia52

How right you are about me rewriting my life.  When I realized that no matter what I did or how I did, I couldn't break lose from the awful victimized life style that I had written at work.  I choose to do something so totally different because I couldn't change things or people.  It was Dr. Phil's words regarding SABOTUERS in Self Matters that I had to spend time on.  He wrote that there were people who were jealous and if they were in power, I could never get pass them.  ANd he was soooo RIGHT! 

 

My organizational skills are a quirk that I have.  Ever since I was 5 years old (my earliest memory), I have always tore things apart and rebuilt them.  Luckily for me, Self Matters comes with a workbook which enabled to focus my energy on.  It's really about your learning style. 

 

For me, with over 20 years of schooling - I do well with homework assignments.  So if you ask questions, I will answer them.  It's hard isn't it when you are so afraid to be truthful to yourself because you will be shamed or humiliated or embarrassed.

 

But when I watch Dr. Phil and see those folks sitting with truths more horrendous than mine, I figure hey, I can tell folks everything and anything cause when I hide it, it owns me.

 

You don't have to work!  My mom goes to the neighborhood Senior Citizen group.  She gets there early to help put together the Meals-on-Wheels lunches.  She serves to the others (she's 72 now).  She goes to MARCs to purchase little items for their bingo games and picks up their coffee and all sorts of stuff.  She's a volunteer.

 

In Cleveland, the newspaper has a weekly column looking for volunteers.  Another woman I grew up with works as a teacher's aide (as a volunteer) and goes to the school about 3 days a week.

 

You don't have to WORK -- you just need to discover who you are.  What you have always wanted to do.  I figure my 7 months off is my vacation from life.  I knew my life wasn't right and when I did Self Matters, I realized that there was NOTHING I wanted to be or advanced to there.  My heart was some place else.  Luckily, I met the qualifications for an early retirement - it took 6% of my retirement to do it.  But, I've finally figured out I could be a Technical Writer.  It's what I did when I worked -- I enjoy writing processes & procedures & developing tools, forms to do work.  I've trained myself and I plan on going to the local college and get a certificate now.  That's my next career.

I, too am good at self-sabatage. If you read the post I wrote to Ritehere re:taking on a management position AND Acute Primary Care! Please note in that post I express anger at others, while I was the ONE who said nothing, did nothing and blamed everyone else.  Honestly, sometimes I look at ME and just shake my head! I think I may just qualify as the 2005 'VICTIM' Poster 'Child'.

 

Thank you for sharing your experience of your mother. I just love that. The little engine that could, will and DOES! I envy you, having a mother that special.

 

I also admire the ENORMOUS self work you've done. That isn't easy. You and Ritehere are EXTREMELY good role models for me. Again, I thank you.

 

 

Brenda

 


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