Quote From: dansfae That type of dedication to purity does not really surprise me. When I was raised I knew of reproduction, but nothing of sex. I did not know it was supposed to be pleasureable or anything about desire. I was only told he puts his thing in you. Sex education at school told nothing of sex--only that sperm and egg got together to make a baby. We were never told how.
I was afraid of my parents. Did not want to get in trouble. At that point in time, highschool girls who got pregnant were sent away. Then I went to college in the mid 60's and everything changed. I had no social skills and therefor few dates. Finally at age 21 I allowed myself to be what is now called date raped because I thought it was finally time. I did not feel anything.
Then I did meet a nice guy, learned what the experience was supposed to be and what desire and pleasure are, and went on to live a fulfilling sex life.
I do believe the purity thing exists. Strong parents can lead naieve little girls who just want to please in this direction.
And "strong parents" can lead a naieve litle girl in the opposite direction by role modeling foolish, immature, irresponsible behavior like moving every Tom, Dick and Harry (or Susan, Joan and Mary) into the bedroom!!!
Please, just because your parents didn't do it the correct way (they wanted you ignorant), does't mean there is not a happy medium.
Our children (ages 7 & 13) know ALL about sex, rape and all the crap (and good stuff) that comes with it. They know about self-respect. They know about people using other people. They know what God wants for them. They know the very probableconsequences of sex at a young age (many are physical consequencs, but some bad ones are also emotional ones). They know that schooling and God are far more important than a "quickie" with young person who would hump a tree!
Whether they wait until marriage is, of course, their choice. But at least we didn't give up on them. We armed them with ALL the knowledge (good and bad) about sex and do not expose them to the "everyone should do it" mentality (of sex) on TV. We answer their questions and use our own experience to let them know that it is best to wait until they are committed to another (spiritual, physical and emotional) before they engage in sex.
We want MORE for our kids than disease, being used, getting STDs, getting pregnant, etc! We lead them in a direction that has them setting their goals MUCH higher than that. Heck, they deserve it, don't they???????????? ALL KIDS DESERVE MORE!
