Replies to 'General Advice'

 There are no tricks here. I think first and foremost before you try taking anything away you need to commit to stop giving in.  This is extremly important now and down the road.  She only will scream, louder, longer and harder as the years go on.  Stop it now while you still have some control.  Start teaching her that you are not going to give in with little things like turning the tv off after 1 show (if she watches it) or going to the park and leave when you say it's time to go.  whatever interests her.  set limits and stick to them.  you will be sorry later if you don't do something about it now!  discover why you feel guilty and let it go. crying will not hurt her she has learned to do it because that is how she will get her way.  Look for tears, i'd bet there aren't any.  Don't get me wrong it is alot of hard work.  I have been teaching my son this from day one but you know what when I say stop if he's going near the street, he stops.  If he really wants a toy, I tell him no, there's little or no arguing.  He knows what I say I mean.  As for day care only let them give it to her at naptime.  That's it.  If you want bring in a book or teddy bear for her to have when it is not nap time.  You can do the same at home.  They need to do what you are doing and visa versa or this will not work.  Sounds like tough love I know but it will only benefit her down the road and she won't be one of those out of control kids on dr phil.  Those kids aren't born that way they were taught that way and don't have any other tools but screaming to handle situations.  This will not change over night  It took 20 months to get here so give it 3-5 weeks to change as long as you and your spouse are commited. best of luck
karen

My son was a "suzzie" fan.  I didn't start worrying about it until he was almost 3 and starting playschool.  I didn't want him to be the odd one. I just took nail scissors and cut the tips off all of his soothers. He didn't like the rough edge and stopped within a few weeks. 

  

BUT, when he was 4 we went together and opened a bank account for him, deposited his birthday money from family gifts and he got his own debit card. He was so business like and grown up signing his name, but the first purchase he made with his card was a new soother.  I think it may have been a test to see how much control he would be allowed over his account.  He used it for a few days but when we didn't react, he dropped it.