Replies to '04/27 Obsessive Love: The Drama Continues'

He has needed to have Power/Control over her from the minute they started dating.  In the beginning, he would do something crazy , apologize and promise to NEVER do it again.  Jeffrey admitted he started taping her phone conversations when they had only been married 2 months!!  He would start putting her down and eroding her self esteem.  He would lie about his intentions.  He would deny what he had done and make her feel as if she is crazy.  He began engineering her dependence on him by getting her pregnant and making her financially dependent on him.  She coped for 11 years through several methods of self protection and because of some of the things that he has done to her. 

1.  She divides herself into compartments.  All the bad stuff that he does is shoved into a compartment that is locked up and rarely opened because it is so painful.  Selective amnesia going into pandora's box.  This is why she appears unemotional.

2.  She "goes along to get along".  She keeps the peace by stepping back and allowing him to get away with what he does.  It is easier on the family if she puts herself last or denies herself completely. 

3.  She becomes the perfect wife, perfect mother, perfect everything.  If she does everything like he wants her to, maybe he will stop what he does.

4.  He isolated her from her family and friends.  She has no one to talk to.  No one who can help her through the crazyiness.  This is his "gift" that keeps on giving.  At a point, she will not even try and make friends because of what he will put her and them through.  She can ONLY have secret friendships now.

5.  At the 2 year mark, when she was at her wit's end trying to deal with all his crazyness, she has an affair.  A person to talk to......because he has cut her off from family & friends.  A person who treats her well.....Because she has been living with this emotionally abuse man for 2 years.  She has a way "Out".... Because, If she gets caught, surely they will divorce and it will put an end to the misery he has created in their life.

Everything that he does is classic verbal and emotional abuse.  If you read through the posts, you will have seen multiple times that other women have said "It was like my story on the show!"  A few changes here and there, but it is the same story, different names. 

Is she safe?  Well, that is possibly the PRIMARY reason that she stays!!  She DOES NOT know if she and her children are safe.  AND WHY WOULD SHE?  He has been doing unbelieveably crazy things from the very beginning.

You would be SHOCKED at how many of us are out there, just like her. 

Signed:  Just Like Her

He has needed to have Power/Control over her from the minute they started dating.  In the beginning, he would do something crazy , apologize and promise to NEVER do it again.  Jeffrey admitted he started taping her phone conversations when they had only been married 2 months!!  He would start putting her down and eroding her self esteem.  He would lie about his intentions.  He would deny what he had done and make her feel as if she is crazy.  He began engineering her dependence on him by getting her pregnant and making her financially dependent on him.  She coped for 11 years through several methods of self protection and because of some of the things that he has done to her. 

1.  She divides herself into compartments.  All the bad stuff that he does is shoved into a compartment that is locked up and rarely opened because it is so painful.  Selective amnesia going into pandora's box.  This is why she appears unemotional.

2.  She "goes along to get along".  She keeps the peace by stepping back and allowing him to get away with what he does.  It is easier on the family if she puts herself last or denies herself completely. 

3.  She becomes the perfect wife, perfect mother, perfect everything.  If she does everything like he wants her to, maybe he will stop what he does.

4.  He isolated her from her family and friends.  She has no one to talk to.  No one who can help her through the crazyiness.  This is his "gift" that keeps on giving.  At a point, she will not even try and make friends because of what he will put her and them through.  She can ONLY have secret friendships now.

5.  At the 2 year mark, when she was at her wit's end trying to deal with all his crazyness, she has an affair.  A person to talk to......because he has cut her off from family & friends.  A person who treats her well.....Because she has been living with this emotionally abuse man for 2 years.  She has a way "Out".... Because, If she gets caught, surely they will divorce and it will put an end to the misery he has created in their life.

Everything that he does is classic verbal and emotional abuse.  If you read through the posts, you will have seen multiple times that other women have said "It was like my story on the show!"  A few changes here and there, but it is the same story, different names. 

Is she safe?  Well, that is possibly the PRIMARY reason that she stays!!  She DOES NOT know if she and her children are safe.  AND WHY WOULD SHE?  He has been doing unbelieveably crazy things from the very beginning.

You would be SHOCKED at how many of us are out there, just like her. 

Signed:  Just Like Her