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Replies to 'Giving and Receiving Support'
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May 4, 2007, 9:52 pm PDT
 Quote From: carina_dancer hi! my name
is carina. I'm 16 (nearly 17). and I really need some help. I dance. It's one
of the most important things for me on earth (really) ... My biggest wish is to
become professional... I'm not from america.... but my jazz teacher is american
.. so last summer she took 7 girls (including me) to the united states to dance
(TREMAINE..) that was the best time in my life... When we were there I was sooo
full of adrenaline that I wasn't able to eat... I never felt hungry ... when we
were at the swimming pool all were shocked 'bout how thin I am... and so on...
the whole week they were talking 'bout me ... I didn't notice that for a very
long time.. I wasn't able to go to the restroom alone everytime somebody else
went also to the toilette... they weren't sure if I throw off... My dance
teacher always told me to eat.. she watched me all the time we were in
restaurant and so on.... there was a test 'bout eating habbits in a dance
magazine she read out loud and wanted me to give her answers but I didn't ...
she told me that I was to thin and so on... I had a "best friend"
(she isn't anymore..) and the husband of my danceteacher is always making jokes
and call her paris hilton .. so once my dance teacher said you are the friend
of paris hilton but you really don't have to be nichole richie... we went home
2 days before my danceteacher returned home because she spent two other days
with her mother... when we said goodbye she huged me and wanted me to promise
her to eat (she said she want's me to be able to dance) I'm not sure but I
think I saw tears in her eyes (but today I think this can't be true) ... [ when
we were in the states wasn't the first time I got told to eat ... She told me
to eat a few times before.. and her friend who also dances at our studio ( she
is a doctor) told me very often to eat... but in america was the first time I
got told very directly to eat.. don't know if you know what I mean okay when
we all were back at home my danceteacher gave me a nutrition plan she
printed out... she also sent me links like (Nutrition Fact sheet -
fuelling dancers).... so 'bout 2 weeks after we returned she took me by her
side after dance class and talked to me... she said that I'm really too thin
and that she thinks that I have an eatingdisorder that I look weak and she
asked me if I would think to be a better dancer when I'm so thin... and so on
... I started crying and said that I really can't see it that I really can't
see the problem because I think that two other girls are much more thin than
me... she told that that's really not the truth... and I really have to do
something she said she could talk to my parents if I want but I told her that I
can't tell my parents because they would never let me dance again (that the
reality!!! with an eatingdisorder my parents would never let me dance again!)
she asked me if I'm throwing off and all that stuff... she promised me not to
tell my parents if I gain weight but if she sees that I'm not she would tell
them... so she bought a pair of scales and weighed me... she gave me limits I
had to reach.. and so on .... she worte me emails ... I had really much
attention... but after 2 months or more I wasn't able to reach her limits ...I
wasn't able to gain weight I really tried no matter that I didn't want that I
tried to gain... I am sorry to hear that your so-called friend said bad things about you. The little facts your dance teacher gave you are correct, for example: your body will perform better if you nourish it properly. It would be worth a try to see your doctor about the anorexia thing, because it is an illness. It's a medical issue that needs to be dealt with right away. If you have anorexia wouldn't you like to know about it? Maybe the doc will tell you that you must have an extremely high metabolism, but please do get checked out. It seems like when you go through bad times in your life you do find out who your friends are. You may be surprised that some of the other girls in your class do care about you and just want to be there for you as you navigate through whatever your issue is. Focus on your dancing and don't worry about christina because her dancing will never get you anywhere. I was a world class trampolinist and I was not in the clique at the gym, but I worked hard at workout and I tried to leave the gym a little bit better than when I walked in that day. It worked well for me. I hope that you can start to feel better about yourself and totally dismiss chrissy's remarks because she is not looking out for your best interests so just ignore her. |
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May 6, 2007, 2:43 pm PDT
Quote From: carina_dancer hi! my name
is carina. I'm 16 (nearly 17). and I really need some help. I dance. It's one
of the most important things for me on earth (really) ... My biggest wish is to
become professional... I'm not from america.... but my jazz teacher is american
.. so last summer she took 7 girls (including me) to the united states to dance
(TREMAINE..) that was the best time in my life... When we were there I was sooo
full of adrenaline that I wasn't able to eat... I never felt hungry ... when we
were at the swimming pool all were shocked 'bout how thin I am... and so on...
the whole week they were talking 'bout me ... I didn't notice that for a very
long time.. I wasn't able to go to the restroom alone everytime somebody else
went also to the toilette... they weren't sure if I throw off... My dance
teacher always told me to eat.. she watched me all the time we were in
restaurant and so on.... there was a test 'bout eating habbits in a dance
magazine she read out loud and wanted me to give her answers but I didn't ...
she told me that I was to thin and so on... I had a "best friend"
(she isn't anymore..) and the husband of my danceteacher is always making jokes
and call her paris hilton .. so once my dance teacher said you are the friend
of paris hilton but you really don't have to be nichole richie... we went home
2 days before my danceteacher returned home because she spent two other days
with her mother... when we said goodbye she huged me and wanted me to promise
her to eat (she said she want's me to be able to dance) I'm not sure but I
think I saw tears in her eyes (but today I think this can't be true) ... [ when
we were in the states wasn't the first time I got told to eat ... She told me
to eat a few times before.. and her friend who also dances at our studio ( she
is a doctor) told me very often to eat... but in america was the first time I
got told very directly to eat.. don't know if you know what I mean okay when
we all were back at home my danceteacher gave me a nutrition plan she
printed out... she also sent me links like (Nutrition Fact sheet -
fuelling dancers).... so 'bout 2 weeks after we returned she took me by her
side after dance class and talked to me... she said that I'm really too thin
and that she thinks that I have an eatingdisorder that I look weak and she
asked me if I would think to be a better dancer when I'm so thin... and so on
... I started crying and said that I really can't see it that I really can't
see the problem because I think that two other girls are much more thin than
me... she told that that's really not the truth... and I really have to do
something she said she could talk to my parents if I want but I told her that I
can't tell my parents because they would never let me dance again (that the
reality!!! with an eatingdisorder my parents would never let me dance again!)
she asked me if I'm throwing off and all that stuff... she promised me not to
tell my parents if I gain weight but if she sees that I'm not she would tell
them... so she bought a pair of scales and weighed me... she gave me limits I
had to reach.. and so on .... she worte me emails ... I had really much
attention... but after 2 months or more I wasn't able to reach her limits ...I
wasn't able to gain weight I really tried no matter that I didn't want that I
tried to gain... Little one...if you do have an eating disorder it can become very dangerous for you. Hopefully, that's not the case. If dancing is your passion and you want it to be your profession, REMEMBER, you need strong bones. You have to nourish your bones by following good nutrition. It won't make you fat, but it will promote good muscle health and strength, and give you good bone density. When you don't eat enough, your body will take nourishment out of your muscles...then your muscles will begin to shrink, and your bones will become weak and brittle. They will break, even if you step off a sidewalk. A weak body is a target for any kind of infection, as well. Your leg bones could become infected, and you will have to have surgery or it might kill you. At the very least, it will cripple you. This is just a small part of what could happen to you if you don't treat your body well, so please listen to the wisdom of those concerned about you. Sometimes people think that tough love will influence another to change harmful behavior, but until that other person admits they have a problem, it doesn't work. Your friends are suffering too, from worry for you, but they don't have enough experience in life to know how to positively respond to you...except to fight it or be critical of you. It begins with you...and it's a simple choice. LIFE or DEATH??
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