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Replies to '05/10 Obsessive Love: Secrets Revealed'

 
jamesfq
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May 4, 2007, 4:20 pm PDT

So...?

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

Oooooooooooooooohhhhh look out, she flirted online. Big deal. Flirting is not cheating.

 

And plus Dr. Phil did not overly talk about her MySpace or the Affairs because he knew that this marriage couldnt be saved and talking about those things would have embolded and validated the psycho to new heights.

 

Suggestive photos? That is such a weak arguement, only 14 year olds or extremely insecure adults get mad over that kind of trite. Its the same as a man saying his wife cant wear skirts anymore cause she looks good to other men. INSANE!

For the record: I love it when men drool over my wife, and she loves it when women stare at me. We're a goodlooking pair, and very secure in each other. Its called trust. Do go into a relationship without it.

 

btw- do you read these posts? The cheating issue has already been covered. We established that he was a psycho before the affairs. For God's sake, she couldnt even have any guests at her wedding!
 
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Pleasance

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May 4, 2007, 6:00 pm PDT

Didn't you watch the first 2 shows ...

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

Didn't you watch the first 2 shows?

 

Better buy the tapes and slow them down, LISTEN, and watch them over and over again.  You missed a whole lot that was addressed and explained.

 

 

Then go to the closest bookstore and buy all the books you can find on Batterers, Abusers, Misogyny, Passive Aggressors, Sociopaths, Narcissists, and the list goes on....but for now you'll have plenty to read.

 

Don't want to spend all that money, go to the library in town.

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
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housewife52
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May 5, 2007, 2:42 pm PDT

You just don't get it.

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

You just don't get it. Period.
 
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kayeff
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May 6, 2007, 12:40 pm PDT

Anxiety and Stress issues???

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

 

Anxiety and stress issues?  Come on.  He has serious psychosis issues and two weeks at a private hospital without a locked unit won't solve them. 

 

You seem fixated on her but you need to stop covering for him. He is a sick puppy. I used to work on a psychiatric unit and we used to put patients on a locked ward for less than this guy is doing. We would not let them go off the ward without escorts. We made them wear pajamas and bathrobes so they wouldn't escape and hurt people. This guy is psychotic and needs to be confined in a serious setting.  Maybe for months, maybe for years but it's better than a dead woman and dead kids.  Whatever toxic dynamic set up between them may have exacerbated his behavior but she didn't "make him" do anything. That's a cruddy copout.


Karen
 
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wonderstruck
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May 10, 2007, 1:52 pm PDT

MySpace is NO BIG DEAL HERE

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

 Why does Dr. Phil constantly address "the husband" in this case?  WHY?  BECAUSE HE IS SO OVER THE TOP INVASIVE & ABUSIVE!!!!!   THAT'S WHY.

Separately, the fact that she was only 19 is a big factor in all this.  Some ways back a reader wrote "Where is her father in all this?"  The reader wrote that if she were his daughter he would have smacked this guy to the wall (but the reader wrote it sanely).  My three children are now in their twenties, and I was surprised that as mature and responsible as they are, their emotional thinking was less developed and they were still impressionable and very vulnerable at 19.  You can't make decisions for them, but they still need a parental backdrop.

So, Jennifer made a big decision that became a big mistake.  It happens. 

But his - the husband's - actions are criminal and  his thinking hugely  distorted and harmful.    You cannot harm someone else to the extent that he has and excuse the excesses on his problem.  It's one thing to have problems and quite another to inflict the damage he has.   His problems have to be taken elsewhere with him.  I think he's done so much damage that it justifiably is over for that "marriage."  It isn't love or marriage - it's some disease.
 
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meowvpi
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May 10, 2007, 2:59 pm PDT

I agree

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

There is some definite shadiness going on here. The girl is giving the guy reasons to be insecure
 
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stregad
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May 10, 2007, 4:05 pm PDT

Creep Factor!

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?

It was completely overlooked because this guy's creep factor is off the chart!  We've all seen Dr. P shows about cheating spouses and who's right, who's wrong, who's to blame, etc., etc.  But I've never seen one of those shows and actually had the hair on the back of my neck stand up!  This guy is setting off viewers' gut instincts regarding danger.  I feel it in my gut like a physical thing, and we all know ignoring our gut feelings is always the wrong move.  Dr. P doesn't want to come right out & say it, but you know he's afraid this weirdo will kill her or himself or both!  Jen's physical safety is what is immediately at stake here and that's why her cheating is being overlooked.  Maybe when we can be sure she is not in danger there will be time to address her adultery.
 
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angiec
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May 14, 2007, 7:20 pm PDT

05/10 Obsessive Love: Secrets Revealed

Quote From: cheechoofan92

Ok. This guy has some SERIOUS anxiety and stress issues. I think he is sick to do these things to his wife. He should get help. But what I don't understand is that Dr. Phil just points the finger of blam constantly at him. He completely over looks the fact that his wife has cheated twice (that he knows of). I could understand that it was a long time ago in their marriage and would overlook it and accept she has changed, but her MySpace totally changed my mind. She had suggestive photos, didn't have her husband on it, and had messages from guys with not-so-appropriate-for-someone-married photos. Why was this completely overlooked?
 
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