Replies to 'Pros and Cons of Gastric Bypass Surgery'

My life partner of 5yrs had gastric y bybass in 2002 1 month after we got together I told her that she didn't have to go through with the surgery because I was attracted to her the way she was ,but she said she did it for herself not for me. She already had it scheduled before she met me anyway, so she went ahead and had it done. I was there with her at the hospital I stayed right by her side, she was in alot of pain after and when she got to go home she followed every rule.  Now it's 2007 and this December it will be five years since the surgery and things have changed drasticly over the years. She dosen't like the excess skin, she says the skin under arms are bat wings, she says  she has no breasts and she looks like a ninety year old women when she takes her clothes off (and she is only 42). She hasn't lost all her weight to her goal weight yet, and even when she does her insurance dosen't cover the skin removal surgery.  So she's depressed about not being able to get it removed.  The excess skin also pulls on her  lower back because it's sooo heavy. She also has given up on any emotional feelings for me or anyone else and our sex life is completly gone. She is always so bitter where before she was always so happy and bubbly. She also wore makeup and did her hair everyday and cared about what she wore and look like, she dosen't care about those things anymore. She said she did all that to make herself look better before because of all her weight, now she says she dosn't have to because she lost most it. She started out 340lbs and  went down to 160lbs but now I think she's probably 185lbs.  She also has alot of gas all the time, and the smell could empty a mall full of people. She says she wish she could bottle it up and send it over to Iraq. It would end the war, they wouldn't need any gun's or bombs. She's finding the lighter side of having to deal with it but really does bother her, the gas really dosn't bother me.  I just feel for her, espeacially when we are at the store or anywhere in public. She also has alot of dyearia ( it litteraly looks like foam ). Sorry about the grapics, but it's true and she has it all the time and sometimes she goes so much that she says her butt's on fire.

She even thinks, she is still too fat and she still see's herself as being the way she was before surgery. Anyway if someone can help her,  it would be awesome or if youv'e dealt with it yourself and can relate please respond back.   I just want o know if this surgery is so wonderful why is she so miserable???,  And what can be done to help ???.   I sometimes wish she would have  never had the surgery, even though I know she is glad most of the weight is off and can get around better.  But what a nasty payoff to beable to have  most of the weight off .

Please help me  help her ,she means everything to me and I love her with all my heart. After everything,  I'm still right here by her side. Even when she has gas in bed at night  I lay right by her and hold her, to let her know that she dosen't have to feel bad because of it .!

Thank You to everyone who reads this, and Thank You to everyone who can help and write's back.!!!!

Thanks,

Worried Partner....