Quote From: miekjeI think you are being to strict on him. he has made a couple of mistakes, but only the 500 time writing would be enough in my opinion. and not taking him on vacation?! after all this punishment. he seems a good boy, and he's only 10, he isn't 16 or something. it seems to me he already got the message. i don't know how long he doesn't have his stuff anymore, but if it's been a week or two, i think it would be enough. i'm not sure if your son really can understand how serious the consequenses would be if he got addicted to drugs. even though you probably told him. he is a kid, and you should punish him as a kid, not as an adult. keep an eye on him with the suicide things, and maybe you should make him find other friends, or make sure you always know what they are doing. i think you should keep him with that counselor for now, maybe his bullying has some cause too, that she can find out.
i don't know how long ago his punishment started. if it hasn't been two weeks yet, i think he's done enough writing. i'd just keep him grounded for one more week, without computer games, and let him watch tv half an hour a day, or an hour. and sit down for a good talk, and explain why you punished him so hard, and how concerned you are about him, i think he'll get the message then. and hopefully he won't do it again.
Thank you for your reply. Im some ways I think he is over punished too and makes me sad but there are so many other issues to the story. His real dad has been doing drugs for a long time and even this past xmas day, my son walked in on him doing a line of crushed narcotics. My son thought it was cocaine. His dad explained how this is a quick effect for his pain. But if the kids were to crush tylenol or even something really bad and snort it for a headache or such...they could die. Major issue. So this is another issue on the table. So we have severity here. Took him to court but we still have to share custody and he even gets visitation still. I do not want my children to be like this. His father also quites jobs every other week. I want my children to be sucessful and out of my house before 30. Not tring to be mean, but that's a reality. My children are also latche key kids. The are very well educated on survival and fire and medical issues and taking care of themselves. They are of higher maturity than most 10 and 7 y.o.. They are more like 9 and 12 or 13 y.o. They can even cook and clean and house work...laundry, dishwasher, cleans the bathroom, and cutting grass. Even pulling weeds. My 10 y.o. even works on a farm occasionally for cash. This of course is someone we know and he likes it and its fun to him. These are not chores either. They do these jobs at free will and make a little cash here and there. We pay as they do a job...just like work. They save for vacation or to just go to the store for a new game. So with this information do you still think a week or two is enough. Maybe the paragraphs should be decreased. Yesterday, I showed up at the house when they did not know I was coming. My son was watching tv and had been playing playstation. This was within the first 25 minutes of being off the bus. He can't even follow the simple rules of no tv. Any suggestions. I don't ever want to be known as abusing my children. I just don't want them to go the wrong path. 10 is too soon for this. I accept all replies even if I disagree. There maybe a solution I have not found myself. Thank you in advance.
