|
September 30, 2005, 10:15 am PDT
I can so relate to your story...
Quote From: amadamsFor years, my husband and I, seemed to just live under the same roof. He is a wonderful father to our 5 children and has changed hundreds of diapers. I was diagnosed with cancer in March. I had my last surgery in August. 5 days after my surgery my husband left me. He said he didn't love me and wanted a divorce. Instead of dwelling on how horrible it was for him to leave me, I took a long look at my part of our relationship. People show love in many different ways. My husband has always been very affectionate. I am not at all. In fact, when he would hug me I would just stand there. Sex was my way of expressing love but due to his feelings of rejection, he started rejecting me in this area. My husband seemed to always be leaving. He would go fishing or play drums. He used to ask me to go but I refused. I was jealous. I decided I couldn't change him but I could change myself. I have learned to be more affectionate. When my husband is going somewhere I either go or tell him to have a good time. In return, he stays home more. Our relationship is stronger than ever. After all these years, I realized I am completely in love with him. Women like to use the kids as an excuse but when they are grown and gone what you have left is your husband and we have to build strong relationships with them now so we can grow old together My parents were not demonstrative at all. My siblings and I were very rarely hugged, and NEVER told that we were loved. I was also molested as a child by a neighbor. My husband had to teach me how to accept affection. Ever since I got over the anger I felt inside, ( with a lot of help from Dr Phil's books) I enjoy giving and receiving the affection we all need. You're an inspiration. Thanks for posting your experience.
|
