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Replies to 'The Meaning of "Family"'
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June 17, 2007, 12:57 pm PDT
 Quote From: penelope3909 mt daughter wont speak to me, and wont allow me to see mt grandkids i ahevnt seen them for 3 months,i live 5 minutes from them, she is mad over several reasons, she tells it like she is mad over only one,she claims to be mad at me because i researched something on the net like she has told me to do she said she had to get a job in a graphic arts design job,i looked up what was there and most of them wanted job experience,she had none, she had her college background,but not a job in that field yet, now she is telling people that i said no one would hire her,those words were never used,if i said this how did she get the job she has now, and she could get hirde at any place she goes ,because she is very intelligent, she is a licensed cosmatologist and very good at it, now why wont she speak to me, i never wanted her to leave the town we live in because any time somethng goes wrong hse would call me for help, if she is a long way from me how would i be there to help her,i know she wants to spread her wings and that is very good,that she wants to better herself,i widh i had been that good at everything, but my job as a mother and grandmother has always come first,i am single was married to her dad for 29 years she is single with 2 little boys, i miss them both very much ,she wont even speak to me at all,just nasty messages and nasty text messages,help! the last time this happened it was6 months before she would speak to me, i want my family to be together again I am so sorry to hear of your situation. It sounds like your daughter only wants to hear how wonderful she is and that she will be great at anything; she doesn’t want to hear the truth, even if the truth is just a simple fact such as a job is hiring people with experience. From what you have described, your daughter sounds very immature. She is cutting you off- punishing you and her children, because she is too immature and selfish to simply talk about whatever issue she has with you and to resolve it. Do you think that perhaps she doesn’t know how to resolve an issue/disagreement? She only knows how to be angry and cut people out of her life? My advice to you is this: I know it hurts to receive those nasty messages, so whenever you receive one, try not to allow the words to hurt you. I know that is difficult. I encourage you to write a short note to her saying something like, “I’m sorry I offended you, I truly didn’t mean to. I miss you and the children very much, please call anytime…” The key is to keep the note short and sweet; don’t explain yourself, don’t answer to any of the nasty messages that she has left for you. Send the note by mail. If you don’t hear from her within one month, do it again- send another note. Keep doing that once a month, because there is a good chance that one of your notes will be received on a day when she is feeling a soft spot in her heart for you. It is very sad that you have to tolerate her abuse but your precious grandchildren deserve to have you in their life. Don’t give up, keep trying! |
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