Replies to 'Pregnancy Loss'

hey, i like the names you chose. thank you for replying. i thought i was the only one in here. i guess the other person isn't going to come back. anyway, it is different circumstances, but grief is grief. and my situation is a lot different cuz i didn't want a baby. well, when i found out about it i didn't. when i lost her, i had come to terms with the fact i was going to be a mom. so, i was kinda looking forward to meeting the little baby inside of me. i hadn't heard the heartbeat yet cuz i hadn't gone to the doctor. actually the first time i went was the day i found out i had lost the baby. that was the weirdest mix of emotions. excitement to finally have this baby made real, and apprehension cuz in the back of my mind i was still hoping it wasn't real. then when i found out i was pregnant for sure but i had lost it. that really screwed me up. at first it was like "whew" relief cuz i didn't have to completely stop my life to raise this baby. then came the "mom" emotions. i was devestated. i had a life growing inside of me and it had died. i hadn't been able to do my job as a mom and protect the life i had created. it was horrible to feel relief and utter horror at the same time. it doesn't even make sense. anyway, i will stop now. thank you again for responding and understanding as much as you know how. i will pray that you get another chance and another baby. you deserve it. jenna

I also lost a baby two years ago.  I was 14 weeks along as well.  I remember feeling absolutly devistated and I just couldn't justify in my mind how I could feel so sad about losing someone I never knew.  I didn't give my baby a name.  I wish I would have because then I think it would have been easier to cope with all of my mixed feelings.  I have since had a daughter and she is 14 months old now.  She is a blast and I just love her to death.  There will always be a place in my heart for the first baby and I will always remember it.  I truly believe that nothing is an accedent.  God sees the big picture all the time even when we can't see any reason for any of it.  He is good all the time, through trials and good times.  I wish someone would have told me to just let go and feel the way I felt.  Just be sad, for as long as it takes and then stop.  I spent so much time trying to not be sad that I never let myself just get it all out.  Just let yourself feel however you want, it will get easier and it will get better.  Hang in there girl!