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Replies to 'Interracial Relationships'
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July 27, 2007, 9:48 am PDT
 Quote From: bellker Wow, is the first thought I had when I read your note... I have some information for you....
Your mother is right. Sad, but true to a certain degree..
First of all, no one is perfect... not even this African man. Is he a citizen of the United States? This is an important question. I'll tell you why I ask when you post a reply...
Second, interracial marriage in some cities, states and neighborhoods experiences ridicule, undue stress and strain and certainly unnecessary strife.
You may never regret the marriage to the African man, but you may cry more than you laugh depending on where you live after marriage. People are people and many of them are prejudice.
Ultimately, you have to make decisions for yourself on who you will marry and what that means to you and him. You can not live your life based on the fear of what your fellow white family and freinds may say or do...
BUT, you can not be thinnned skined, you can not wear your feelings on your sleeve and you have to be able to allow insults to roll off your back like water off a duck.... Because it will not be easy...
NOW, sure as I say that.... your experiences may be totally opposite, as no one can see the future... many times people ridicule others because they are jealous, wish they had what you have or wish they had the nerves or the bravery to do as you are or have done.... One never knows the motivations of others. Your mother could be one of these people, maybe she always wanted to interracially date but feared what she expressed to you.
DON"T let the fears of others dictate your decisions.
Above all else, pray about it. Be still, be quiet and listen to the spirit. You'll know what's best as the holy spirit will lead and guide you all the way.
Again, is the African man a citizen of the US.....
Talk to me...
Sincerely Thank you so much for taking the time to answer some of my questions! No, he is not yet a citizen of the U.S. The way he sees it, if we have eachother, it won't matter what people say..but then, when it comes right down to it, it probably would matter. Not having seen much of the country as yet, I love learning about new cultures, meeting people from different countries, and would consider myself very lucky to have the opportunity to be a part of the Zambian culture...meeting his parents/family. My feelings are so mixed. One part of me wants to end it all in order to please my family, but the other part wants to ignore what they say and go with what my heart says. The hardest thing for me is having to look at everything he has...seeing all of the amazing qualities and yet, because of skin color.... if he was white, my parents would have absolutely no problem with him. *sigh*
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