Replies to '09/03 Who's the Evil-Doer?'

This is my second marriage (I have two girl's from my first) and we have 3 children together.  I have tried to be the very best DIL my MIL could ever hope for yet she has a third world Sicilian mentality and is very evil toward's me every chance she get's! I've put up with this nonsense for over 20 years!  My husband is tied to her apron to this day! It's even worse since his father passed away nearly 10 years ago(she even blames me for his death!lol) as she control's all the money. She supports my husband financially and believes everything he has ever told her!  I learned that he is the major cause of the division between the entire family.  All because of money!  I told him in 1998 that I would give him 5 years to get his act together, choose between her or I or I would move and take out children with us because we need a 'support system' and not to be treated poorly by his family!  I made my way in 2003 and bought a home out of state hoping he would miss us so much that he would see the light and he didn't because he can do as he pleases, and does not have to participate in anything or work a regular job like most responsible men(age 51) and he allows his mother to pay all the bills and buy him whatever he whats and he does nothing for his children or I!  My MIL is ignorant, does not drive, swim or ride a bike.  She couldn't hold an intelligent conversation to save her life yet she can gossip and meddle like no one else I know!  So I moved away and refuse to buy into all the drama and "Soprano" like family they are!  Bullies like you would not believe!  My husband and I dated several years prior to marriage. We had planned our wedding and several month's into the planning I became pregnant and we decided this was a blessing!  The first grandchild for the family!   My SIL had been married for a few year's and had no children as she made the choice to abort her first two pregnancies so they could have all their heart's desired first while she allowed her family to believe she had 'fertility problems'! 
My MIL told me 2 weeks prior to getting married to her one and only son (she has two  daughter's) that she "did not want me having her first grandchild" and proceeded to tell me that she "wanted me to have an abortion'! (She now sits and reads her bible!) I was devastated by her and realized she was evil. I tried to kill this woman with kindness and nothing was ever good enough!  I gave 5 wonderfully gifted and beautiful loving grandchildren( ages 31, 28, 20, 18, 15  and lost 3!) to this family that place's more value on money and material things instead of being happy to have a family to dance, sing and celebrate life with!  Can you imagine how lonely I would have been if I had listened to that old bat! I am now a grandmother of three and she has even meddled into my daughter's lives so terribly and they allow it!  I ignor all of them and try just to do the right thing alway's and know that they are the one's truly missing out on what is most important!