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Replies to 'Self Image'
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October 23, 2007, 1:30 pm PDT
 Quote From: Jenn I had a baby about a year ago. I was very thin before I got pregnant and I looked really good. But now even though I have lost much of the weight I gained during the pregnancy I do not look the same way that I did during the pregnancy. I don't think that I look bad, but everyone else seems to think so and they make comments all the time like, "Boy you sure have gotten big." or, "You sure have spread out." My father-in-law frequently says to me, "Boy your legs sure have gotten huge. Your butt is really huge." My husband says that he loves me but that I am on the verge of really being unattractive to him. The thing is that I am only about 20 pounds over my original weight and I really don't feel that I am very overweight. I was a little underweight before. I am heavier than I used to be, but everyone makes out like I am morbidly obese or something. It is as though they can no longer see the things in me that they liked before. I am really smart and funny. I'm a good listener and a good friend, but no one cares about that anymore. Every time any of them look at me they feel they have to make some comment about how "huge" they think I've gotten. I am so sick of this. It really makes me feel bad. I have told my husband this, but all he says is, "Well I'm just telling you the truth and so is everyone else. You don't look as good as you used to. If you don't like what everyone is telling you then lose some weight." My husband says that I am 60 pounds overweight. If I lost 60 pounds then I'd be anorexic. I don't know what to do. Does anybody have any ideas? As for your family members: rude, rude, rude! Were they born in a barn? Do they want some hay? (=
Nevertheless, in order to make YOURSELF feel better, try walking around the neighborhood at a fast pace with appropriate walking/running shoes. It will help your body AND your mind. Your husband is being insensitive when he says things about your weight...my word, you just had a BABY!!! Forget the verge...he is very unattractive to me (by his comments anyway).
You sound like me. I was actually underweight until I had my first baby. The weight that I did gain fell off within 6 months. I know--I was fortunate. However, I gained more weight with my second child who was stillborn. I was so depressed that I never lost the baby weight. When I got pg and had a baby 2 years later, I had 15-20 pounds to lose. It happened...just give it time, and try walking. It's the only thing that works for me. I started walking again a couple of months ago and now walk about 45 minutes every day. I love the feeling and the weight loss. Remember to give it time: I know this is old, but Rome wasn't built in a day. I hope this helps. Hang in there!! Diane |
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January 6, 2008, 12:43 am PST
Quote From: Jenn I had a baby about a year ago. I was very thin before I got pregnant and I looked really good. But now even though I have lost much of the weight I gained during the pregnancy I do not look the same way that I did during the pregnancy. I don't think that I look bad, but everyone else seems to think so and they make comments all the time like, "Boy you sure have gotten big." or, "You sure have spread out." My father-in-law frequently says to me, "Boy your legs sure have gotten huge. Your butt is really huge." My husband says that he loves me but that I am on the verge of really being unattractive to him. The thing is that I am only about 20 pounds over my original weight and I really don't feel that I am very overweight. I was a little underweight before. I am heavier than I used to be, but everyone makes out like I am morbidly obese or something. It is as though they can no longer see the things in me that they liked before. I am really smart and funny. I'm a good listener and a good friend, but no one cares about that anymore. Every time any of them look at me they feel they have to make some comment about how "huge" they think I've gotten. I am so sick of this. It really makes me feel bad. I have told my husband this, but all he says is, "Well I'm just telling you the truth and so is everyone else. You don't look as good as you used to. If you don't like what everyone is telling you then lose some weight." My husband says that I am 60 pounds overweight. If I lost 60 pounds then I'd be anorexic. I don't know what to do. Does anybody have any ideas? How rude and inconsiderate some people are!
Honey, it took you almost a year to have a baby and it can take a year or so get your body back to its pre-pregnant shape! How do YOU feel about yourself when these buttnucks aren't saying asinine things? Pretty good, right? Well, to hell with them, then.
As for your husband ... how perfect is he? Bet he's no George Clooney; more like George Constanza!
WHAT is your father in law doing even LOOKING at your backside? Doesn't this comment make your husband wonder about his dad?
Ohhh, the fact that you gave your husband and his dad a child/grandchild ~ does THAT mean nothing? How SUPERFICIAL can these two guys be? They are more plastic than my credit card.
Who is "everyone" that your speaks of? Your true friends wouldn't say anything.
Sounds like the gene pool needed some chlorinating and thank God you came along.
You take care of YOU and if and when you want, or feel like losing any more weight, do so on YOUR terms.
They say that you can tell what a woman will look like later in years by looking at her mother. My retort to that is if you want to see how your man will treat you, observe how his dad treats his own wife. BTW, what does your mother in law say, if anything at all?
Next time grandpa dearest says something about your backside, tell him that his mouth has gotten bigger too and is directly proportionate in size to your behind.
Next time hubby says that he's not attracted to you, you calmly say, "Likewise."
I'd say that I was sorry for being so irate but I'd be lying.
Keep your head high and being a good person. BTW, it took me about 18 months to get my figure back. |
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