Replies to 'Differing Sex Drives'

I have been in my second marriage for 9 years and he is fine as far as affection but when it comes to going to bed he always goes to sleep.  I even try and seduce him but that doesn't work either.  Then when I ask what is wrong with me he gets mad and tells me it is isn't me it's him.  What the heck does that mean?  He won't go to the doctor he won't go to a counselor so does that mean he isn't attracted to me or what.  He is 48 and I am 42.  I didn't have an active sex life in my first marriage (twice a year, if that) and he knew that.  We had a great sex life in the beginning but it is like he doesn't care.  He says the same thing...I show you how much I love you, I give you affection all the time, it is all of it that counts and sex is just a small part. Bull!! It is a very big part. It is intimacy.  If I wanted a roommate I would have got one not a husband.  We are down to once every 5-8 weeks and then it only lasts a few minutes.  I think he just does it to shut me up.  My first husband told me I would never find anyone else who would want me...I guess he was right.  I feel as though our marriage could be a lot better if he would just try to find out why (if it isn't me).  I don't know what else to do either except to give up on it and just live with it.  I know though I couldn't be truly happy because I would always feel as though he doesn't want me and I am not attractive to him. Any suggestions?  If your marriage is like this after 3 then you better do something now before it becomes like mine.