Replies to '06/02 Banned From the Wedding'

It’s a great thing that you cancelled your wedding, but right now, you’re in couples therapy?  Sweetie, in this case, I would’ve also called the engagement off from the wedding if I were in your position.  It is one thing to “honour thy mother and thy father” but to hit your wife/fiancée/girlfriend because she called your mother an “ignorant redneck” when she was clearly acting like one?   That is a line crossed right there.  It’s obvious that he is nothing more than a MAMA’S BOY, which can be just as bad as a coward.  Lady, I think I would take the kids and get the hell out of there.  Your man isn’t likely to change.

Seriously, there should be something to be said about all this “honour thy mother and thy father” business, and that is: “ONLY WHEN MOTHER AND FATHER DESERVE IT, AND NO OTHER CONDITION!”  A mother who won’t have anything to do with her grandchildren, calls her child’s significant other horrid names, and doing whatever she can to keep her son (or in the father’s case, his daughter) in the “never married” status is, in my very humble opinion, not a parent who is worthy of the child’s honour.  Perhaps the only acceptable reason is if the custodial parent got out of a really tumultuous marriage full of lies, cheating and deceit; and as a result, tells the whole world what a mistake marriage is, and basically decides to go on an anti-love crusade that may or may not include demanding that Romeo and Juliet be barred from the high school English curriculum (claiming that high school students should not know what romantic love is!)  After all, why should his/her children make the same mistake of falling in love, right?

Psychiatrists have long said that it is not good for people to be obsessed with anything.  An obsession with family togetherness should be no different.  I applaud anyone and everyone who does whatever it takes to keep a HAPPY family together, but if a MISERABLE family shows no interest in changing their ways, (they usually don’t) then I don’t see why the children here should stick around for their parents.  An adult wouldn’t (and shouldn’t) do the same for a spouse who’ll never change, especially if there are impressionable children involved.