Quote From: champagnedolli need advice my daughter wants to move out to be with her boyfriend 24/7. She is continually causing arguments with me when she is at home and I feel like she just hates me. She has told me the only reason she is here is because she doesnt have a job to move out. We give her absolutely everything including a car, petrol money, spending money etc as we want her to get ahead in her life, I dont know what to do whether I should let her move out and stop all means of financial providing for her in hope that she will appreciate all we have done for her.
Any advice would be appreciated
- HOW old is your daughter? Is she the age of majority?
- WHY doesn't she have a job?
- WHY are you giving her absolutely everything?
- WHY are you tolerating the habitual arguing in YOUR home?
She's only there because she doesn't have a job? Why then, doesn't she GET a job? Seriously, why are you enabling this type of spoilt brat behaviour? Are you afraid of losing her? Are you giving her everything just so you won't lose her?
If she's not in school, she should be employed FULL time and paying you rent. In addition, she should be helping with the mundane, day-to-day, household chores that are necessary to run a functioning household. Using YOUR car? She had better learn how to fill up the car because there aren't "gas fairies." Unbelievable.
To be with her boyfriend 24/7? Is he not working either or does she expect him to pay for her way in life? Sorry, but life doesn't work that way. To paraphrase Shakespeare, "You've got to be cruel to be kind" and in this case, I'd advise you cut her off financially completely.
Let her live with her boyfriend, get a job, etc. She wants to join the "Big Kids Club" and that means employment, responsibility and making your own way in life. You and the rest of the world do not own her a living.
If you want her to get ahead in life, the school of hard knocks unfortunately, is the road sometimes travelled. My guess is the she'll be back and when she does come back, have a set out rules written out that are to be followed.
