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Replies to 'Overcoming Grief'
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July 28, 2005, 9:00 pm PDT
 Quote From: tierd5 Lets see were do I start. I guess with the fact that I was raped 8 years ago and wound up pregnant by the whole ordeal. Four months after the rape the man that I loved more than anything died in a car accident (I also have an older daughter with him). I had my son five months later and when he was a week old my sister died of brain cancer. So needles to say my whole life was turned upside down without a warning. My family refused to talk about my rape they wanted me to just go on. I tried but it was impossible. Then when everything else started no one wanted to talk about it either. I seen a psychiatrist, but it wasn't enough I needed my family. A year after my sister died I started dating a man that I thought would be there for me and I married him, but he's not. I used to love him, but I don't anymore. I still have feelings for a man that is no longer alive, and I am trying to make my husband into him. My husband however doesn't think that there is anything wrong. How am I suppose to move on knowing that I cant have a man that died almost 8 years ago?? you need to talk about this and get some support from a family member like a grandma, cousin, aunt, uncle,ETC. if you can't I see by reading your currant husband sounds like a great support system. but not talking about it will not make it any better. you need to get it out so you can heal from the rape. and loving a dead husband is ok but just don't make your currant into him. your currant husband is his own being and can bring so much more to your life if you let him. sure you can remember your husband before and the great memories you had those you can't forget. :) Let your currant husband be himself and he could be the support you need to ge thru all this and sounds like you still need counseling also. But talking to someone or a group would help you. you can't sweep this under the rug and hope this gets better like your family hopews it would. you need to pray to god to God also and ask of him all these questions you have and I know you will get answers if you just learn to listen. God always answers. But please go to for couseling as you still need to talk about all this still. You have a wonderful husband who will support you, it will be hard, but he is his own person ,and if you let him show you wow what a wonderful couple you both will be. I know it can happen. it takes works but you can do. . 2nephi |
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