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Replies to '12/07 A Killer Among Us'

aunt_rainy

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December 6, 2007, 8:56 am PST

12/07 A Killer Among Us

Quote From: missy123

I had went through a lot, my father was on his death bed then my grandmother died. I was at a low like i have never been in. I've always been strong willed and independant and never thought it would happen to me. But during my grieving process a guy that i just had begun to date a few months prior stepped up and was there for me and my kids. I had to come running back from a vacation from FLA when my grandmom died. He was waiting in my drive way for me. He took me to get the kids clothes to order flowers and do everything i needed to do. After the burial I was very depressed. I mean it took every ounce of strength i had to get out of bed and go to the bathroom. He was there for me he really was. Helping me the kids and just normal household chores and running errands. He was great... or so I thought. Then he found my ex's class ring and an OLD pager that i had just put up and figured when i got up to around wheres his parents live i'd drop it at his parents house... he flipped about it. Wondering when he was at my house last and blah blah blah... that was the first sign and he did pass this off as a bad day.. but the jealous increased.. the controling started .. not wanting me to wear low cut shirts or skirts or summer dresses which is what i always wore. TO begin with i was really depressed and didnt fight about it,, i was like what ever, it's no big deal and I dont have the strenght to fight about it.. I really didnt at that time. I had wondered why i hadnt heard from ANY of my freinds in a long time.. No even so much as a phone call. I started calling them and they told me he would answer say i was asleep and tell them he would tell me that they called.. WELL he never told me ever and he went as far as to erase the numbers from the caller id and erase their voice mail messages to me and NEVER told me a thing!! After i realized this, i sat down and had a talk with him, and let him know im not putting up with this and he needed to change his ways or it wasnt going to work with us. He swore he would change... but he didnt. IT got worse, fast! HIs words was that he wasnt controlling and jealous "HE WAS BEING PROTECTIVE" that he didnt want anyone to ever hurt me... I was getting over my depression and wanting to get back into my life and do things.. and yes without him sometimes. It ended up gettting really crazy. he pushed me down once and hit me in the chin once. He started making comments about some weight i gained.. then i seen it... and realized what type of a relationship i was in... How the hell did this happen to me??? I told him it was over and It wasnt going to work.. He refused to leave, and used an upcoming court case that he was the only witness that could get my brother off of false charges. he was the only one not related to anyone in any way so his testamony was the key to keeping my brother out of jail for years. SO of course he used that to stay.. and it worked until the court case was done.. so then came the plan. He refused to leave. So he went to his parents house to stay for the weekend to help out with a big home improvement job. I got my fathers truck and some family members, packed up everything that was his, called the state police for an escort and took everything to him and told him it was over and I meant it. He tried for over a year or so to get back together using every excuse in the book.. but i never went backwards like that. Im now with a sweet loving man that would never do anything to hurt or control me... a normal healthy happy relationship...... BUT like i said situations in your life can make your guard go down where you dont see the warning signs of an abusive controlling man..

You are absoluately correct and it's slime like him that prey on your vulnerability unfortunately.

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