Replies to '10/07 The Latest Debates'

So you'd rather see a mom with a pump attatched to her breast than a child? 

If you've ever had a child who was confused by the changing of nipples from a breast to a bottle, you wouldn't be so quick to come up with this "solution."   

Yes, a lot of mothers DO use a breast pump, but if she's in the grocery store, and the child is hungry, and she doesn't have a bottle of expressed breast milk on hand (they DO go bad, you know.  it's not a can of pop, it's milk.) then what is she to do?  I promise you that more people are going to give her dirty looks for letting the baby cry so loudly than for being a good mother and feeding it. 

There are a number of reasons why a pump isn't an option for a lot of mothers. 

1. The most effective pumps are very very expensive.  The cheap ones hurt like heck and don't work well at all. 

2. Many women cannot let down for a pump.  Meaning their bodies do not produce the same amount of milk for a pump that they do for the baby. 

3. Many babies refuse to take a bottle. 

4. For many babies using a bottle can cause nipple confusion and cause a lot of problems with breastfeeding for mom and baby some of which can be very painful. 

5. One of the reasons for breastfeeding is the fact that you don't need to buy bottles, sterilize said bottles, and reheat milk. 

Several of you have asked about why the mother couldn't pump and feed from a bottle. 

LOTS AND LOTS of very legitmate and good reasons. 

Some breast babies REFUSE to drink from a bottle.  I had one like that.  When I returned to work after 12 weeks, it was awful because she would NOT take a bottle while I was gone for 8+ hours at a time.  It took WEEKS of trying over and over day after day before she would.  For a mother who does not work, why should she subject her child to that? 

As for pumping, first a lesson on how this whole breastfeeding thing works.  Let's say I nurse Baby at noon and we're going out to the mall.  for a few hours.  Right after I've nursed her, there IS NO MILK FOR ME TO PUMP AND BRING WITH ME.  I have to "wait" for my body to make more.  And even if I had a 'stash' of milk saved up, using that and NOT letting baby empty my breasts when they need to be emptied would DIMINISH MY SUPPLY. 

It's a perfect supply and demand system.  If I substitute a meal and don't use my supply (i.e. the demand appears to have been reduced) then suddenly the SUPPLY is reduced. 

Here's another REALLY IMPORTANT thing about the pump... It is a great tool to use when mom cannot nurse baby.  For example, I've pumped at work a lot for my last three babies.  However, the pump isn't NEARLY as efficient at getting milk out (and keeping supply UP) as the baby is.  So.... while I'm happy to pump when I'm at work, *ANYTIME* I am home with baby (or at the mall or at McDonald's or where ever) I will need to leverage the act NURSING in order to keep my supply up.  Pumping at work is already something that threatens my supply.  By using the pump when I don't have to (because hello? I'm there and can nurse) I would be risking my nursing relationship. 

I am a discreet nurser.  I use a blanket (not OVER her head, but in order to 'block' the view).  I have special nursing wear that allows me to be discreet.  Still, even if a breastfeeder is less discreet than I, I can still recognize the rightness of her feeding her child.  And if it makes me a little uncomfortable to see boobage in public ('cause really, none of us are accustomed to that, right?) then it's MY problem and I can deal with it. 

Besides, I've been a mom for 22 years and I have NEVER EVER EVER EVER seen these flashy show-it-all nursers.  NEVER.  And I travel the country and still, nope, I have never seen them.  BECAUSE THEY ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN.  Most breastfeeding IS discreet.  And you people with hangups need to GET OVER IT. 

it's not just about bonding.  It is also about cost, convenience, lack of time... 

for one it not only takes time to pump, then you have to clean up and sterilize not just the pump but the bottles as well.  And you know how much time new mothers have... 

A good pump costs quite a bit of money, and the cost of bottles adds up too.  kind of defeats the "free" benefit of breast feeding.   

besides, i don't like pumping.   it is so impersonal, not comfortable, and i don't like to be hooked up to a machine if I can be feeding my daughter directly.     

Also i'm not very effective at pumping, but she certainly gets enough directly from the source.  my daughter won't drink out of a bottle, so when she's unhappy in public, forcing a silicone nipple in er mouth won't make her happy. besides, there are such things as nipple confusion.   

my house is not my prison and my baby is not my jailer.   

besides, i'm offended by people who bottle feed in public... 

re:  "...when the mom is holding baby to her breast while sacking produce and tossing soup cans in the cart."    

kudos to that mom, she is certainly quite impressive to be as coordinated as that.  How many moms do you really see with their breasts pulled out in the grocery store?  or did your mother's uncle's sister -in-law see it?