Replies to 'How Childhood Abuse Still Affects Me'

I think the hardest thing in being a survivor is moving past the pain and the mental damage it's done to us.  I know that I've faced my abuse issues and sometimes felt that because I wasn't incest, I should not feel that I'm a survivor. 

I don't know how many times I worked on healing what happened to me and how it affected me. But it finally happened when I did Self Matters. I know I was molested at 8 years old.  I know that it screwed up my head, my life, my thinking, my happiness, my relationships with men, and the list is ever so long.  I still feel uncomfortable around children because WHAT IF I become a molestor.  What if I.....   But I know that it's not apart of who I am -- which has finally released me to be more open with my life mistakes and errors and most importantly forgiving myself for the wrong decisions I have made in my life.

I've cried those tears for many years - is it strange that I don't feel them any more?

Do you see a counselor?  If no, look for one that is into COGNITIVE THERAPY - that's Dr. Phil's area of expertise.  A support group is also helpful.  I was a member of one for a tiny little while and it really helped but I felt that I wasn't like them because incest wasn't involved - well, I'm not sure about that - however, I don't feel like it happened and that I'm not repressing any memories.