Replies to '10/07 The Latest Debates'

Quote From: gladiw8d

I  came home Friday from a local high school where I gave a message about the character it takes to love someone so much you would not put them at risk --- at risk for stds, at risk for unexpected pregnancy, at risk for emotional or relational consequences.  I watched 15,16, and 17 year olds --- boys and girls --- line up to tell me my message changed them, they saw sex in a new way and they wanted to save those wonderful experiences for marriage.  70-80% in each class, day after day....

Then I came home and saw Dr. Phil say, "Abstinence program don't work." 

I was broken-hearted that the same person who says, "We teach others how to treat us" doesn't think young people can teach others that they are worth waiting for.  The one who says, "Stop giving away your power!" says our kids can't control themselves.

I saw Dr. Phil blithely say, "Comprehensive prgrams have proven the most effective..."  If all we care about is that society doesn't have to pay for the "unwanted babies" or the cost of stds, maybe then a condom & a pill would be enough.  But sexually active teens are more likely to be depressed, do poorly in school, fail to finish college and to consider suicide. 

It's not enough!  Because their hearts are WAY more important than their privates.

No 12, 14, or 17 year old  is ready for the emotional bonding that comes with sexual intimacy --- most adults aren't even prepared for it!  Giving them access to birth control or handing out condoms even with "comprehensive education" will not MAKE them ready! 

And what about the conclusive proof that saving sex for marriage is linked to lower divorce rates, greater sexual satisfication and the completetion of higher edcuation.

Abstinence works  --- every single time.  Maybe not every abstinence PROGRAM works --- but abstinence does.  If young people heard messages about their value and how THEY decide how they want to be treated, if we empower them at every level of society to develop the character it takes to make this 100% healthy decision, then we wouldn't have to worry about the ineffectiveness of condoms ----  which according to the 2001 Reoprt from the National Institiues of Health, varies tremendously for different stds, and which Dr. Phill dismissed as "an obscure study."

The problem isn't that the kids "are going to do it anyway" --- the problem is adults, unfortunately now including Dr. Phil, won't give them the chance and the tools to choose a higher standard than previous generations. 

I wasn't given those tools and my consequences are permanent --- I'm sterile from multiple infections and openly share with the kids the relational and emotional consequences of aborting the only baby I would have... the difference is someone taught me, I could START OVER.  I have lived what I teach.  My example proves to students it can be done, and that is is worth the fight.  

My heart is broken, Dr. Phil.