Replies to '06/18 "My Big, Fat, Spoiled Family Member"'

 
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January 11, 2008, 12:25 pm PST

Yesterday I got some distrubing news

Quote From: yoadrienne

For Petes sake,  Stop paying her bills!! Ok, take care of your grandson, clean her house if you like, but stop paying her bills. Its like you are giving her a clean slate to go out and charge!

Perhaps this is a far extended problem that could arise to others that help raise children to believe that it is all about the ownership of things that is more important than being real.  Perhaps it is just my need to get some kind of understanding out of it.

 

This is what happened:

Ten months ago one of my favorite nephews of my dad, passed, one month after my father did.

 

A few days ago, our family was given the news that our cousin's body had been dug back up so that an autopsy could be performed.

 

It was discovered that my cousin (in his 60's at the time of death) had been poisoned by anti freeze.

 

No warrants for the arrest of his wife has been done at this point, yet her bank account, and credit cards have been seized by the court system.

 

The reason why the wife is being implicated is simply due to the fact that a short while before my cousin's death, my cousin told his mom and sisters and brother that he believed that his wife was a poisoning him since he told her that he was going to divorce her due to her uncontrollable spending habits.  (Uncontrollable nausea and malaise that the doctors couldn't find a cause for.)

 

So the question until it comes out in the court system is this:  Can persons used to a way of life of shopping until you drop...at the thoughts of no longer being able to do such, go to this large of an extent to continue it?

 

Murder?

Just my thoughts at this time.

ps.  My cousin and his wife hadn't been married that long.  This was his second wife and he had no children with her.

 

Love, Light and Peace

We Are All Blessed

Tonie

 
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January 20, 2008, 9:04 pm PST

01/11 "My Big, Fat, Spoiled Family Member"

Quote From: yoadrienne

For Petes sake,  Stop paying her bills!! Ok, take care of your grandson, clean her house if you like, but stop paying her bills. Its like you are giving her a clean slate to go out and charge!

Thank you for responding to my post.  I should have been more clear about 'paying her bills'.  I had POA while she was in Iraq.  I paid her bills with HER money...not mine!  With her gone, and unable to 'spend' like she usually does (although she spent enough 'online' while she was in Iraq....a new bike showed up for my grandson one day!) I was able to get all her debtors paid....and even save a lot for her.  Since she's home, she's gone on several 'trips' and the balance in savings has dwindled considerably.  I don't clean her house for 'her'...I do it for my grandson!  NO child should have to live in filth or climb over boxes and trash to reach is bed!  I feel that 'someone' has to teach him right and since mom isn't....I have to.  Trust me, cleaning her place is a monumental task and makes me very sick...not just at the filth, but the waste and knowing I raised her so differently.  To see brand new things walked on and ruined?  When so many folks have little to nothing?  To see my grandson so indulged with 'things' when he only 'needs' her time and attention (like learning his multiples), it grieves me.  But I'm coming to the conclusion that my attempt to 'clean' for her is like spinning my wheels in the mud...it never ends and I wonder if it will change anything.  She 'claims' that if I get her organized, she would 'maintain' it...I wonder.  Sunny 
 


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