Replies to '01/25 Secrets in the Suburbs'

Good day everyone

I have made the mistake of going into this lifestyle a long time ago and am very happy to be out of it.  Let me tell you a bit the story.  I had made that decision myself to my husband because I thought I wasnt enough for him.  I knew a woman was after my husband and I got scarred and forgot who I was and did whatever I could to keep him.  How stupid was that?

I went on a website where I met a couple.  We went with them in another province because I didnt want to go in my hometown incase I would meet someone I knew.  We met them in a restaurant and talked a bit and went to that swingers club. I was so nervous.  I was shaking.  I was so afraid of how I would react when or if I would se my husband kissing another woman.

I sat on my chair most of the evening and he went dancing with the woman of that couple we met.  I had a few drinks trying to relax but it wasnt working. 

We went back to our hotel room and my husband who had a bit too much to drink, was pressure him to have sex in the same room as this other couple.  I didnt want to.  I was so scarred.  I was crying in the bathroom but my husband was getting so upset at that time so I bended and said yes. 

We had sex in the same room as this other couple but no one touched no one.  Believe me, I kept checking where my husband's hands were going.  I wasnt enjoying this at all.  Just wanted everything to be done and over with. Finally that other couple decided to go in the other room.  Finally I could go to sleep.

The next day, we met that couple to have breakfast. After we left, we said goodbye to everyone and when I turned around I saw my husband kissing this other woman.  My heart was broken.  I was devasted.  I was telling myself, how could it be so easy for him to do that.  I will always see this image of this first kiss in my mind.  I was so hurt.

When my husband came in the car and saw how hurt I was.  He said he was sorry and that it probably wasnt for us.  He was sorry to have hurted my feelings.

All this to say.  You need to have this wall around you to be in that lifestyle.  I could continue a few stories but I will stop here.  If you go in this lifestyle, people go there to realize certain fantasies and are using you as toys to these fantasies and you are doing the same.  This lifestyle is not for everyone.  Wasnt for me at all.  I am happy to be over this part of my life.  Just hope that no one has to be hurt that badly. 

Have a great day