Replies to 'Is This Normal Social Discussion'

I don't wonder about you at all. =) There is no set date or age as to when it is 'right' to be deflowered. The only right thing is when you are ready for it emotionally. That could be any age at all, and to completely honest with you it is more likely older than that average guy starts. Most guys who jump into sexual activity at an early age are not emotionally prepared for it, it is simply a game of conquest. Which is not what a sexual relationship is about at all. But immaturity abounds and in some cases continues for a life time with some boys/men.

 

It shows an enormous amount of integrity that you have obviously spent a lot of time discovering who you really are. You are aware you were not ready. That is more honest than many people ever are with themselves!! Hats off to you!!!!

 

The time will come and you will know it when it happens and lucky you that your mind will be prepared for the full meaning of sharing the most intimate moment of your life with another person. Not only will it actually mean something to you, but my bet is that special person will be thrilled that you took the time to know yourself first. After all how can you possibly begin to know someone else without knowing yourself? You can't and that my friend is what is so very wrong with so many guys to begin with.

 

I have three sons, two of which are in their 20s and they had the very same fears you have. Just know you are not alone in your thoughts and concerns, they are quite normal. =)

 

~Ami

The only thing I have to add to what Ami said is, well, stop telling people that you are a virgin.  It is none of anyone's business but yours and the woman that you do eventually have a relationship with.  You have a lifetime ahead of you to enjoy your sex life, good for you for being smart enough to get through your insecurities first. 

I wouldn't worry much about what others think. You are protecting yourself from serious diseases, if nothing else. Many men don't mature until they've lived on their own for a while. Finished school. Held a job. Got their careers started. Nothing wrong with that.

 

Do you have goals set for yourself? Sounds like you have decided it is time to start dating seriously. Perhaps looking for your future partner. I think most girls would be glad to know that you haven't been gathering sexual conquests, like it's a big game hunt.

 

Whether you are a virgin or not is no ones business anyway. It's special that you have waited until you feel ready. I hope you'll find a great young lady who has remained chaste also, but that shouldn't be your only criteria. Don't rush into anything. Just get to know each other. Share feelings, goals, etc. The right woman will be proud of you.

 

Please come back and share with us. We do not judge. We just offer our own views and any advice we might have. When it's right, you'll know, but don't be in a big hurry. Welcome...kak