Replies to '12/28 Wifestyles'

You are being emotionally abused. I'm sure he does have an idea of what you do all day but simply doesn't care. This is all about HIM. You only count in how you can provide him with what he wants, how he wants, when he wants. It will never get better for you because, frankly,  he's got his life arranged the way he wants and sees no reason to change anything, especially anything that might require him to think of someone other than himself. No matter how hard you try, he will never be satisfied; you will always be too stupid, too lazy, too something or other negative to live without him - or so he thinks and probably has said. 

You are college educated, and have been employed so you have skills with which you can support yourself and your child. I'd suggest couple counseling but, as I said, he feels HE'S not the one with the problem. If you can find free or low cost counseling for yourself, go. Trade babysitting with a neighbor so you can go. And start planning a future without him because he will never change. If you're uncertain about this,  imagine spending the next thirty years living like this. Imagine the effect on your child.  

If you decide that this is not the life you want to live, quietly begin to gather your joint financial information, make sure you have credit in your own name, money of your own tucked away, and an emergency suitcase packed in case you have to flee. Have copies of important documents (birth, marriage certificates, passports, mortgage, bank statements, car registration, important phone numbers and addresses, will and health care proxy, powers of attorney etc.) in the suitcase, and hide these where only you can find it, or leave it with a trusted friend. Pack spare clothes etc. for the baby as well (and his records.) Know the local women's shelter number, and/or the numbers of a family member or close friend you can rely on. Confide in the baby's pediatrician. And when you have all your ducks in a row, then you can decide if you want to continue in this life. And if you are threatened, don't wait - leave, preferably when he's not home to try and stop you. He does not own you. 

You may feel very alone right now, but know that you are not. Many women have faced this same situation and not only survived but gone on to thrive in a new life.