Quote From: horsegramaDear Waihini 1,
As I read your story, it was so familiar and I thought that you were writing my story. I can surely relate to you and your troubles. PLEASE, GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN. You are being VERBALLY AND EMOTIONALLY ABUSED ON A DAILY BASIS. I too suffered the emotional pain and hung in there for TOO DAMN LONG. It is CRAZY MAKING. We aren't crazy, we keep trying to make it better and it won't work. Take it from me, I lived it for over 18 years. It doesn't get any better only worse.
I caught my husband cheating both times with cell phones. He got careless and I know one girlfriend is married and likes her drinking too. The other 2 I didn't know. Yes, that's right, he couldn't be true to them either. He was balancing 4 women at a time. No wonder he had a mild heart attack.
I am looking forward to a brighter future. It takes time to heal. I'm still working on it and I see a therapist every other week. She has helped me tremendously.
Waihini 1 stand your ground and get out from under his CONTROL AND MANIPULATION. I wouldn't have sex with him, he could be giving you a terminal disease. Be careful. horsegrama
Dear Wahini 1,
I think a lot of wounds were opened by this. I was married for 13 years to a liar. Horsegrama is right... get out!!! It is abuse! I have the same story except that if I had sex 7 times in the last 10 years of marriage I would be surprised. I used to count. It started a few months apart when we were first married, then went from 11,13, 18, 21 and 23 months. I finally figured out that no sex was better than having sex with him. There wasn't trust from the beginning. Lie after lie after lie. I never did know when he was telling the truth. When he actually did tell the truth he was angry because I didn't believe him. He attacked me and I had to call the police. The police wouldn't allow me to return to my home for 24 hours. He told them I attacked him. That was the final straw. Do you want to hear what is sad? If he hadn't attacked me I probably never would have woken up! I could take the emotional abuse. I finally learned my worth. I don't need a man to dictate my value. It was scary starting over but I swear, I am so much happier now! No, he wasn't having affairs. He was too mean, no one would want him. He is now looking for wife #8. He married and divorced since I left him. Okay, so if I knew I was wife #6, why did I? He was 50 years old and hadn't been married in 10 years. He became a Christian (not a Godly one) and I thought that part of his life was really over. He is now 67 (I'm 47) and he is looking for someone at least 25 years his junior. I think Dr. Phil should find him and put him on the show... get out and get a supportive system sister! You will live through this!!! Lisa
