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Replies to '07/16 Bully Husband'

 
michiganderres
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February 17, 2008, 7:41 am PST

Change must be done

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

If all of this helps you to change, then I can forgive all of the times that we have suffered it.  You know, family can be a powerful tool.  The support , closeness and love that Karen has from her family is what you hate most about us.  We don't tell her what to do in her own life, but we are listening.  You have the most beautiful family and you have not been able to see it out of selfishness.  It's okay!  As long as you see it now, while the kids are small enough not to have it effect them.  Your kids are the most beautiful miracles in life that anyone could dream for.  Even myself.  Let's stop this madness and become a loving family like it should be, that way you can have the extra support that you need too.  As it stands now, you're not getting it!    You're family also needs to be supportive of Karen instead of ridiculing her the way you do.  They do not help matters because they are only supportive of you and what you are telling them.  Fix it!  You can do it, I know that you can.  Take the shame and throw it in the garbage for good!
 
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bailey58
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February 17, 2008, 10:33 am PST

Is this for real?

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

Is this poster the real husband in this show? Or just some guy playing along?

I honestly hope it is the husband and he and Karen are getting help they both need.

 

Imagine being a kid with these conversations going on around you?? The sons would end up doing that to women and the daughters would expect to be treated that way. I would hope you want to be better role models for your children.

 

You never talk to you spouse or ex-spouse that way when the kids are around, they learn by what they see and hear. No matter what they are still part of each of you, so when you insult one of the partners you are also insulting your child as well!

 

Grow up!
 
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bailey58
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February 17, 2008, 10:47 am PST

Is this for real?

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

Is this poster the real husband or someone pretending to be him?

 

If it is the real husband I hope you both get a ton of therapy to stop behaving like this. How can you speak to your wife, whom you supposedly love like that? How can you speak to your daughter like that?

Do you expect she will pick a good mate later in life when you have told her she's not good enough from the age of 4?

 

Children learn to live what they grew up with, so if your belittling your wife, the boy will be doing the same thing to his wife/girlfriends. Your beautiful daughter will pick men who pick on her and verbally abuse her too, cause that's what she's use to.

 

Don't show the children this behaviour. Show they love, kindness, affection, not anger or verbal abuse.

 

Grow up!
 
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housewife52
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February 17, 2008, 5:05 pm PST

02/20 Bully Husband

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

Good for you. And Karen also. And the kids. I'm so glad you're getting help and can see the err of your ways. Don't be ashamed, the shame would be in NOT changing. Good luck to you and your family.
 
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suesuern
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February 20, 2008, 8:00 pm PST

Whatever

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

OKAY IF YOU ARE THE GUY ON THE SHOW HERE IS MY OPINION.

1. I WOULD HAVE PUT YOUR CRAP OUT OF THE HOUSE ON THE CURB, CHANGED THE LOCKS, FILED FOR A PROTECTION ORDER AND FILED FOR A DIVORCE AGES AGO.

2. THE PICTURES OF HALF NAKED WOMEN WOULD HAVE GONE THRU THE PAPER SHREDDER

3. YOU WILL NOT TEACH MY CHILDREN THIS TOXIC BEHAVIOR OF INSULTING AND DISRESPECTING YOUR MOM, SPOUSE OR ANYONE

4. INSTEAD OF COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW SHE DOES THE LAUNDRY, FOLD THE DAMN CLOTHES YA LAZY JERK, IS A LITTLE HELP TO MUCH TO ASK FOR?

5. SHE DOES MORE WORK TAKING CARE OF YOUR HOUSE, THE KIDS AND YOUR SELFISH BUTT IN 1 DAY THAN YOU DO IN WEEKS.

6. TAKE A LOOK IN THE MIRROR, YOU ARE NOT BRAD PITT AND REALLY NOT REMOTELY GOOD LOOKING

 

YOU AND YOUR BEHAVIOR HAVE TURNED THIS BEAUTIFUL WOMAN INTO A SHELL OF A PERSON WHO IS AFRAID OF YOU AND YOU TREAT HER LIKE A SUBSTANDARD SLAVE. ALL IN AN EFFORT TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER BECAUSE YOU ARE AN INSECURE,  NARCISSISTIC, EXCUSE OF A MAN.

 

I HOPE SHE GAINS THE STRENGTH TO KICK YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE AND OUT OF HER LIFE. YOU DONT DESERVE A GOOD WOMAN LIKE HER. IF MY SIGIFICANT OTHER WOULD EVER TALK TO ME AND TREAT ME THE WAY YOU TREAT HER HE WOULD BE GONE OUT OF MY LIFE IN SHORT ORDER. NO WOMAN CHILD OR ANY HUMAN DESERVES TO BE TREATED THE WAY YOU TREAT KAREN.

 
 
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ptrobi
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February 20, 2008, 8:53 pm PST

whatever

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

You couldn't change enough for me.  You are a pathetic excuse for a man.  I  hope your wife leaves you.  I'm not usually this harsh, but you have totally broken your wife's spirit, so much so that she couldn't even show much emotion on the show.  I hope the counseling that your wife gets, helps her to realize that she is beautiful and worthy in every way to have better.  You're evil and mean and I hope you get exactly what you have given, which is nothing but pain.
 
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stressedinky
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February 20, 2008, 9:02 pm PST

What Gives You The Right?

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

I have been married to a man like you for 23 years. 

It wouldn't matter if your wife weighed 120 lbs. you would still treat her this way.  A wife can be skinny and still be treated like "s**t".  Why is it ok for the man to be fat and not the wife?

 

Our divorce will be final soon. 

 
 
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tanyachapman1
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February 20, 2008, 10:54 pm PST

Are you really ashamed

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

 Do you really feel bad, or are you just saying something to make yourself look better?  How could you not know that you were abusive?  What galaxy were you living on and how much oxygen was in the atmosphere?  Who are "The other people?"  Do you mean your daughter?  You want us to give you a Chance to heal, how much healing did you give Karen or your children? 

I don't think you are sorry, I think you can't handle knowing that only you think you are fabulous.  It's not nice to have someone point out your faults is it?   THAT'S NOT SALT, THAT'S MOTIVATION DEAL WITH IT.
 
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mrsclough
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February 20, 2008, 11:13 pm PST

Changing is easier said than done

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

First of all, you definitely have a lot to be ashamed about.  I don't think that you should even be calling Karen your wife.  A real man would never treat anyone like that most of all his wife (hint to you...being that she is your wife, she is someone that you are supposed to love and protect)  Whether you believe it or not, you have killed her spirit and hopefully she will be able to now start to rebuild that with the help that Dr. Phil provides.  I honestly believe that you do not deserve another chance.  If you truly loved your wife, or even just cared for her as a human being, you would have never treated her that way...and you don't deserve to have anything more than the responsibility of child support with your children either.  I don't care how angry you are, a four year old could never do anything bad enough to be talked to the way that you do.  I hope that you realize the issues that your daughter is likely to have with men when she grows up...girls tend to learn how relationships should be through their fathers.  TRANSLATION:  If your daughter allows herself to be in an abusive relationship like your wife, it will be your fault!!  She will think it is normal for a man to treat her the way you treat her mother.  I do believe that Karen is at fault as well, she should have taken your children away from the situation, but that in no way takes any of the fault away from you.  You better pray that your wife doesn't leave you (I will be praying that she does, for her own sake and the sake of your children) because you are definitely not attractive and although that is not normally what matters in a relationship you lack the personality and everything else.  I hope that you truly do change by I think that it is a lot easier for you to say that you are going to change than to actually do so.  And for the record...you deserve salt being thrown on your wounds...I honestly can't believe that you even think that you have any wounds.  Karen and your children are the ones with the wounds.   And sometimes people need to hear the truth from strangers to realize how much they need to get themselves out of a situation.  I know Karen may not want to hear that she should end her marriage and begin starting her life with her children as a single mom, but the truth is, that is what she needs to do to get on with her life. 


Karen,

  You still have time to make things right with yourself.  I think that with Dr. Phil's help you will be able to start over and build yourself back up.  I also want you to know that there are men out there that will love you for the woman that you are.  I think that you need to get back to the woman you were, you husband has torn you down so much that I am not sure that you even know who you are anymore.  I will pray for you, I believe that making the changes necessary you can get your life back, and you still have plenty of time to find the man that will truly LOVE  you and CHERISH you the way that you deserve.  For now make sure that you get back to loving yourself and cherishing yourself.  You are a beautiful woman no matter what your husband has told you and you may be a little overweight, but you do not look that large.  Womens bodies change after they have kids.  You seem to carry yourself very well still and you need to know that you can do so much BETTER!!!
 
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lrs321
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February 21, 2008, 2:52 am PST

Bully Husband

Quote From: ashamed1624

To all the responders who haven't even seen the show yet, it doesn't get any better than the trailer. For I was there to experience the pain of karen (my wife). I had no idea I was that bad, for people don't video tape their lives, and go over them at night and see their mistakes and correct them the next day. I would like to apoligize to Karen and let you know that every action has a reaction, and no one knows what we are really going through in our lives, but that is no excuse for the way I have treated her or other people in my life. We are currently "BOTH" getting help, thanks to Dr. Phil and his wonderful staff. And as time goes on hopefully we can fix our marriage, but it will take some time, and alot of apologies from me. Please give us a chance to heal instead of throwing salt on the wounds. For now  " I " know how she feels after reading your comments.

                                 Ashamed

Has reading a few negative comments about yourself brought you down a few notches??  It's only been a few days of negativity for you, imagine the years of abuse your wife has had to endure and at your hands.  If she is still with you it is nothing short of a miracle. 

 
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