Quote From: petlpushr1I was in an emotionally abusive marriage for 14 years....to a narcissist. It changed everything about who I was. I saw Rick as identical in abuse to what I suffered. It took everything I had in me to get myself back to knowing who I was and happy to be who I am. That was over 15 years ago. It wasn't until I realized that he was also emotionally abusing our daughter that I realized I had to get us out. Even with counseling, I think a narcissist has too much resistance to change. They believe they are right. Professionals just get paid, they only do what they do for money...there is no end to the rationale a narcissist can use because they know best. I hope she doesn't wait until her daughter is too scarred before she realizes it just doesn't change..... it just doesn't change.
You are so right!! It doesn't change. They will twist and manipulate anything, everything and everyone to make themselves look better and to cover what they do.
Congrats for getting out!!! IT IS so hard to get out. We think that they will get a clue, make amends...but it doesn't happen...they go back to their ways again and again. As women, our capacity for hope and doing the "Right Thing" keeps us there so much longer than we should.
We all must do it in our own way and our own time. BUT.......it really helps to know that others are going through the same thing!!! It does help to educate on this topic. More than anything it helps one to feel vindicated about what they know in their mind that they must do....which is leave because they DON'T change!! KNOWING you are NOT wrong about what he has been doing is PRICELESS!!!
Karen and others in this position MUST listen to the red flags that pop up telling us that "they" are going back to their old ways. We have LEARNED to ignore those red flags. EMBRACE your intuition and listen to it!!!!!! IT WILL NOT FAIL YOU!!!! Heed the warnings that you get from your gut! AND WHEN THE RED FLAGS DO POP UP.............DON'T GIVE AN INCH............DEMAND WHAT YOU KNOW IS RIGHT!!!!! This is when Dr Phil's life lesson............YOU teach others how to treat you............applies!!!
Good Luck on your happier future!!!
Mgrlady
