Replies to '03/25 Tired of Being a Mom'

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.
 

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.
 

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.
 

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.
 

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.
 

Quote From: shadycat1

 Not all women are cut out to be Mothers, sad but true reality. Unfortunately, many of them don't find that out until after they have children.
Babies are cute, but they require 24/7 care, and then the different ages and stages can be frustrating, parenthood isn't something you "try on " like a new outfit, the new outfit you can donate to charity or return if you figure out you don't like it.
One of the biggest disservices I've seen done to international adoptees, is seeing the shows that show the happy family with few issues, sadly this isn't the case tha majority of the times.  These children usually come from orphanages where there are many children per worker, they have never been taught to bond with one person, or they come from conditions that have made them unable to feel safe and secure, I'm not saying it dosen't work, it can and does but those are the parents that go into this with an open mind and have researched the reality of how these children have been living, and what issues can come up from this.
As for the disabled, "but for the Grace of God go I", I've never dealt with it.  But for her husband to say its easy, he probably goes to work every day, and I wouldn't be surprised if she is with the child 24/7 and needs a break.  Sometimes we need a break from our so-called "Normal children" , they can be a handful and frustrating, so a child that has Down's Syndrome and Autism cannot be easy, and those parents do need help and compassion, this Mom can't leave her son with the neighbor's teen daughter and go shopping for an hour or two, and maybe the grandparents cannot physically help, or they have no other family around that can give her a break.
Mom coming and going, not good.  If she can't handle it and her husband can, then maybe there should be a role reversal, she be the weekend parent and he be the single parent.  Coming and going like that is not good for the children's state of mind or their feeling of security.
I do wish people would get to know themselves first before having children, the reality is rarly the same as the dream.