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Replies to '04/14 The Dr. Phil House: House of Greed'
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April 16, 2008, 8:19 am PDT
 Quote From: dreamer123_07 You said "This whole thing has nothing to do with money or a will",, There is a lifetime of stories that led up to this and the hurt cannot be fixed over night! Sonja is without a doubt, the central part of the problems! BUT Lisa is old enough to handle it in an adult manner, instead she came off acting like a child. Being an adult, does NOT including ANY mention of wanting to benefit from a death of another person. That is my point! Lisa and her daughter DID go on about the will and that is what I just can't understand!
You said " Sonja gave her teenage grandchildren Christmas ornaments for Christmas and then got all hurt that they weren't thrilled with her gift?" What?? OK, Sonja shouldn't have got visibly upset by that, I'll agree to that one! And I hope that she didn't respond in front of the children, But honestly, no one went into detail about exactly how she reacted to it, at the moment that it happened. My mother gave Christmas ornaments to my teens for years and they were thankful for ANY small thing they got from her. And those ornaments, were given from my Mom's heart. Since when is it right to teach children that it's OK to be ungrateful and not appreciate ANY gift that they receive??
Everyone wants more in this life! We live in a I WANT more, more, more, better, better, better society!! But at some point,,, when and where does common sense and morals kick in? Obviously, everyones approach in this story needs to go in a different direction if they are ever going to fix things. "That is my point! Lisa and her daughter DID go on about the will and that is what I just can't understand! "
I believe the person you just answered quoted from dr. Phil saying that he explained that Sonja used the will as a means of telling her children who she does and does not love........... She included her granddaughter in that!
It is Sonja that has made her will a symbol of her acceptance and love and a symbol of who she favors etc. and then you do not understand why her daughters and granddaughter went on about it? Perhaps Lisa is trying to explain what we all have been trying to explain as it being a symbol of something larger and Lisa's daughter understands her mothers pain with being rejected from grandma and feels that SAME rejection!? And those thinking that she's "only focused on "The WILL" keep hearing her say "she cut me from the will" but they just can't seem to grasp the significance of that............ It means "she's cut off her love from us completely" That's what that says & it's an indefinite thing because after death it's final!
Lisa didn't say her children were "ungrateful" for the Christmas ornament gifts they'd gotten she just said that her mother (their grandmother) got hurt they weren't *thrilled*! And if this woman is so wacked out that shed *turn her daughter away from the hospital to visit with her mother and new born sister because Lisa hadn't *called first* what makes you think this grandmother DIDN'T get visibly upset in front of the grandchildren? She seems to play the victim very well here........
the most insightful thing I think in *your post* and the most insightful thing you've said is that there is a "life time of hurt leading up to this" and if the dysfunction from Sonja goes as far back as the birth of her younger daughter I imagine it goes long before it as well. Lisa should be mature enough to handle some of it, however we are continually taught that we're suppose to turn the other cheek and that all grandchildren should have their extended family etc. and so living in this "I want more, more, more" life perhaps Lisa has continued to try to gain some kind of acceptance and LOVE from her mother! That's why this daughter moved in so close to start with. Her *moving close and side by side* IMO is her attempt at trying to develope a close *side by side* relationship with her mother. And her mother let her sinnk in deep so she'd be stuck with a HUGE finacial bill to get out of a place that will not only hurt Lisa but Lisa's children as well! What better way to hurt a woman (your child) than to hurt HER kids too?! It's the ultimate wound isn't it?! Where are the "morals" in this? |
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