Quote From: bj1962I have read the board from the first part of this program, I look forward to seeing the second part on Monday.
For myself? This is so not about money nor land....nor wills. These are symptoms of something so much deeper, yet arguing about these things probably feels safer for these folks than dealing with what are truly the issue(s). This *mother* needs to look at why she witholds love from her eldest daughter, I'm sure she has plenty of surface reasons...but it is much more than that. This didn't just happen over night, this has become the relationship between the two of them....the way they have learned to communicate.
I am not sure the youngest daughter is old enough yet (or has enough life experience) to understand where her sister is coming from, and be able to separate what is 'real' as opposed to what she has been jaded with by their mother's input to her.
I don't think that it is as simple as a 'group' effort to 'get along', the relationships between mother/eldest daughter, mother/youngest daughter, as well as the 'sister' relationship are separate to me.
I guess I just don't get why some parents think that pitting their children against each other is 'alright', I do get the 'control' aspect...but how is that meant to 'work' in the end? Nobody truly 'wins'....
I (we) have three kids in their twenties, good grief, if I ever thought them to be so bitter and divided....especially over me? It would break my heart to pieces...I would spend the rest of my days trying to figure out 'why'...and making it better. What better can one give their children than a feeling of 'belonging'? Of being a part of something soft enough to land on...yet strong enough to hold you up when the world throws a curve ball? As mothers I believe we are meant to ready our children for the world...how can we send them out there with such a cracked foundation and expect them to thrive? They will be the parents of our grandchildren...what will we have shown them?
I guess I don't get it....and I think I am fairly glad that I don't.
I hope there is some help for this 'family'...sometimes I have a problem with the root meanings of words when they are used in a general sense. Words like 'mother' and 'family'...they tend to mean something different to me....good luck to them.
bj
Sonja, bless her little heart, may have a personality disorder. It explains why she believes she is right, and refuses to consider the possibility of other options. The problem is not what Sonja thinks, it is how powerfully Sonja feels that she is on center-stage in her own little world. She is the director, and has absolute command of any situation. Everyone else, including her friends and family, must cater to her wants and wishes.
She likes high drama. She lives for drama in life, and she is determined to create drama even when she is dead. Try and imagine anything more dramatic than having a 'bad daughter" and a "good daughter?" Playwrights have made their reputations on this. The possibilities are endless--just like she intends for them to be.
